Originally posted by bizzyb at 1-2-2012 15:14
I'm not a married man, so forgive me if my question comes off as ignorant, but is there no way to resurrect sex with your wife? There are articles out there on marriages where the partners stopped hav ...
Yes there is
and if you're in a marriage, keep the hope alive, keep your shared vision of a happy shared future, and keep trying everything you possibly can
and keep it going for all the good things it brings you, for as long as you can find good things it brings you
BUT
the reality is HE still wants sex with her, and SHE isn't responding any more. There are multiple possible reasons, and some of them are permanent.
EVEN IF there is a solution, it will take a long time and active commitment from both of them, and is unlikely to ever get the frequency of sex back up to the satisfying level it once was
Fact is some (not all) older women do lose their need for sex ... and even if they regain it, many women can go for a decade or more without having sex. Men can't. Whether solo or with a partner, whether frequently or not, we need to unload the pressure when it builds up. Not as often as peeing, but similarly.
so ... unless and until she does change (back) and become responsive sexually ... he still has to take care of his own body's needs. Otherwise he will be in no place to be rational / patient / accepting / resourceful with a wife whose behaviour is prompting him to feel neglected / misunderstood / abandoned / betrayed.
Originally posted by JckJr
but still think you were quite out of line here. Be a gentleman even if the girl is no lady.
That's almost as funny as what he did. Come off it!!
If you (and others!!) think like that you are the direct CAUSE of her manipulative and inconsiderate behaviour.
SHE could just as well have said, "listen, I like you and want to have sex with you, but I need some cash, are you OK to give me $xxx as a gift?"
BUT she didn't
INSTEAD she played a transparently manipulative charade of pretending to be sensitive and high-class by insisting on a high-end joint,
then cheapening it with a sort of logic that ONLY a woman would ever understand ("the money you saved ... LOL!")
It was all so slick, FOR SURE she had done it before, and successfully ... so she would do it again ...
Come off it. He played it brilliantly.
AND in the process he put aside his ego and his desire to have an argument with her on the spot ... no, he saw the opening, and played the player.
She would have been EXPECTING an argument, heck she probably already had arguments with other indignant bros she seduced, and she was all ready with her 'clever' ways to fend it off.
The ONLY way to show her it's not smart to do it again with another bro - and to make her wonder if another approach might be better - is to make her experience being let down herself. |
