aw geez wander
i love ya bro but ya know what...i can't relate.
i had much the same situation when i lived in BKK. and some nights i didn't want company. i'd watch a movie or read a book.
of course i was doing Thai classes serious-like and sometimes after an afternoon of that, i'd SMS one of my regulars as i was walking home, get the response-i-wanted and...SCHWING! but, it's Bangkok. time is relative. they'd stay over for hours, i'd get in a few, she'd get in a few (unless it was Massive Attack, THAT was a different gladiator).
if i got bored with any of the regulars i'd do stuff like go see if i cd find some gal buying some grilled meat and have talked her over to my place before the stuff was cooked. or something like that.
i was NEVER bored.
don't get bored here either, but when some gal called me today just cuz she wanted to talk, and i cdn't because work was biting my ass again, i wish i had TIME to be bored.
so i got a cure for ya, wander.
duct-tape your wrists/ankles to a sturdy non-conductive chair bolted to the floor.
attach electrodes to your nipples, testicles, penis, and other body parts. nothing stupid (i.e. both nipples are on the + side.
power source is equally sane: a big 9-volt battery. enough so u REALLY feel it.
nothing's connected but connections are almost touching. no spark-gaps, but ANY metal rolls over a gap and ZZZZAP!
roll a ball of aluminum-foil on the floor btwn the connection strips and release 23 catnip-crazed kittens. of course the center of the foil-ball has an aromatic chunk of catnip. it bounces between the connection strips and the kittens leap on it...
i GUARANFUCKINGTEE you u wd NOT be bored, my bruthah.
;^)
JtB
PS: alternatively, skip all the electric stuff and kittens, just let those ladies yr so BORED with in there with, oh let's see:
A) a bucket of ice and a few lit beeswax candles.
B) a huge roll of Saran wrap and some long tickly feathers.
C) nipple-clamps, a safety razor and some shaving cream.
D) all of the above.
JtB | |
