A little about me before I ask the question.

I'm divorced, Asian American male, and have another 6-8 years before kids are done with college.  After that, I'm thinking that I want to retire, get snipped, and relocate to a cheaper SEA country.  I'm not filthy rich but have a nice savings and can probably spend $30-$40K per year comfortably in the new country.  I honestly am not looking to get re-married.

I did do a search on "marriage" and "mistress" but didn't see a similar thread (sorry if this has been asked before).

Here's my question.

Want to get thoughts from bros on what they think is the best country (or countries) to retire to and real options to get a mistress/fuck buddy.  I think this will be easy enough if I'm willing to re-marry but that's not something I want to do.

Anyone with experience with live-in maids that provide sex as part of the monthly salary, or seeing multiple woman on a regular basis without commitment (hear alot about Singapore but that's an expensive country to live in)?  Really not looking for love, just a woman that is willing to trade sex (preferably exclusive) for some financial security.

China, Thailand, Indonesia, Cambodia, Philippines, Vietnam... any of them will have what you're looking for I think. I think it depends more on what sort of lifestyle YOU want to lead. Lower living cost for you = more money you can find on partner(s). You should be able to find some fun in Eastern Europe also if you want.

~UD

I would have to disagree on China, maybe just because I have worked here for so long. It is no longer cheap unless you're willing to live out of the cities then what is the point if you're going to do that.

For me, I would say Thailand or Vietnam. You can buy a nice house in or around Pattaya area for about $100K US or rent a long term apartment for a decent amount. It would not break the bank. You could get one or two regular GF and pay them a monthly allowance.

An old friend of mine did this. He rented a serviced apartment 6 months a year out in Pattaya, some sort of time share deal. He had one regular gf he paid her about 5K HKD a month, even when he was not in Pattaya and he would travel there every other month and she would live with him. If they get too clingy or serious move on the next one.

I moved from SEA country to Somewhere in North America because of my job/industry.  I get to pick and choose where I  want to pursue my career (I know: very lucky), and back then I  realized this might be the country I will stay for very long time .....I remembered the 1st thing that came to mind was 「try not to pick a country that’s within “Ring of Fire”」.  I believed Mother Nature can only get angrier because of  Global warming .      JUST Saying

Thanks everyone for your thoughts.  (I know, I know, I should be the one to learn).

I've been to China, Thailand, Indonesia (only as a kid), Cambodia, China, Philippines but never to Vietnam.  Been to Malaysia also and (too expensive) Singapore and HK.  Not interested in Europe because I know I'll be more comfortable in asia (and the food is much better too).

House, rental costs will be a factor.  I think most of these country do not allow you to buy outright but lease for X years.

Petay_1283 - can you ask your friend, is the relationship exclusive and how he did it e.g. thaifriendly?  I can handle 5K HKD a month but if its not exclusive ... hoping to do away with condoms   Ask him to join this forum ... I have to believe there are other bros here that would want to do something like this

Explorer1 - I am researching Bali which I believe is in the Ring of Fire unfortunately.

UncleDad - I don't need to stay in a big city but don't want to be remote remote from civilization either.  Definitely prefer where many can speak some English

Batman 108 - Don't speak Mandarin but China is probably low on my list to retire to.  Main reason is I only see more tension between China and US in the future and/or an economic crash like Japan's two (?) decades of misery.

[ Last edited by  playaccount141 at 18-9-2018 11:56 ]

I agree on China, far too expensive as compared to Hong Kong which is mongers paradise.
China wg prices once the Yen to £ conversion takes place prices are comparable to the UK. Very poor value for money.

Not exclusive no. I think it is more friends with benefits etc

He met her in a bar in Pattaya, once he started paying her she does not work in the bar when he is there but when he is not she will still work there. But he still bangs other birds lol

China is still plenty affordable if you go to 3rd tier cities (or lower).... but @playa.... if you want to get by with some level of English, you’re probably looking at Philippines or Malaysia as your best choices. The rest, you’ll only be able to get by with English in high tourist areas for the most part.

~UD

Vietnam could be quite good IMO, visited Saigon earlier this year and there are so many hot women around, lots of people speak English and it's still pretty affordable, while quite well developed and civilised. Way cheaper than top tier Chinese cities and way nicer than everywhere else in China.

Hey playaccount141!

I am already planning retirement like you and it is easy. With 40k USD you will live very comfortably in Bangkok as having a middle class lifestyle in Bangkok honestly only costs around 12k USD a year. Further unlike in North America you will not need a car, meaning no car maintenance, insurance and gas bills! Further your cost of living expenses plummet as you don't need work related expenses such as clothing and food.

Safest option is to rent in Thailand and get massages and laid all day. Mistresses and wives only cause trouble cos they will just nag you to get married. When you get old just hire a qualified nurse for like 5k USD a year and you'll be set.

Further private health insurance in Thailand is cheap.

Of course Thailand in SEA countries is already expensive. Phillipines is even more viable as they are fluent English speakers and the cost of living is even cheaper.

Vietnam is roughly half the price of Thailand but of course it lacks the infrastructure and Westernisation that Thailand has.

Even within Thailand you have Bangkok, Hua Hin, Chiang Mai and many cities to live. Of course the easiest method is to relocate to a cheap place in the States and just have extended holidays in SEA.

Even the money you save from heating living in SEA will get you a long way.

Pretty much if you have around a million in savings, invest in bond portfolios you are destined to live a comfortable life full of pussy in SEA. Even 20 years down the line when inflation hits, just move to Cambodia, Laos and cheaper places in SEA.

Lastly the main thing are visas. Thailand is the retirement Visa where if you set up a Thai bank account with around 5k USD you can live there permanently. However Vietnam and other places don't have that way of living.

[ Last edited by  Ladiesman88 at 20-9-2018 19:52 ]

[ Last edited by  Petay_1283 at 25-9-2018 09:29 ]

Ladiesman88,

Sorry, got cut off mid sentence when giving you acceptance above.

Good to know my budget is pretty good.  Let us all know how it works out for you,

Ideally, want a woman in an exclusive relationship with me so I don't have to worry about being covered all the time.  So although I can probably get sex all the time in Bangkok, I'm looking more like exclusive "mistress" while I bonk some others covered.  I get that mistress may be high maintenance but think I would be okay with that in exchange for a more consistent relationship vs WG all the time.  If it gets too much, I can always cut and run and compensate her.  I'll be upfront with her that marriage, kids and green card won't be in the picture, its only going to be money for sex.

I know that's not "fair" and won't be an "equal" relationship but that would be ideal for me and, in exchange, I would be providing financially for her and family as part of the deal.  So WG-turned-mistress probably won't work (prob makes more than I can pay her), it'll have to be a regular woman that works and isn't that happy with where she is in life.

Yeah, I'm an asshole thinking like this.

[ Last edited by  playaccount141 at 21-9-2018 12:22 ]

Bro, planning it out is a good idea.  I think some factors depends on the demographic of the girl you are looking for.  If it's a MILFy type maybe in her 30's or 40's, low-paying job, and you can supplement her income for a better living, she might be agreeable.  If you are looking for sexy 20-25 year old, college student, smart, hot and attractive girl, I doubt they would agree to your type of offer.  They would not be interested in "exclusivity" unless you shell out some big $$.  And even then, they probably want to fuck around on the side... how would you know?  You probably won't hire any detectives to follow them.

A more mature woman would be better anyway, they are more stable and willing to care for a dude in this fashion.  One risk if there is great chemistry is they might fall in love with you, which is a different problem all together.  

Just a thought exercise on this as I'm curious about Thailand, or specifically Bangkok.

- $40k USD = 1,301,400 THB. Or 108,450 THB per month.
- A lot of expats seem to live around Ekkamai. I'm seeing monthly rent from 20k to 45k. Let's just say you want a comfortable place which ends up at 25k.
- Daily meals can range from 150 to over 1,000. Portion sizes in Thailand are half what you get in America, so you'll want to budget a little higher. You'll also want to eat out at a nice place now and then because you want Western food and not be eating Thai street food all the time. Conservatively 20k a month. The Westerner's budget/spending for food is way, way higher than local Thais.
- A regular freelancer can be 2k per session. We'll say that girls honestly like you more than most guys and you manage to get it down to 1k per meeting (sometimes paying for the session and sometimes for free but covering meals and taxi but it all averages out). You're a horndog so three times a week works out to 12k.
- Hitting the bars and adult entertainment districts. Really everything for personal entertainment. 8k a month.
- Miscellaneous expenses like home electricity, transportation, mobile phone, clothes, etc. we'll say 1k a month.

66k THB per month conservatively. Not bad! Though that's still A LOT of money being spent each month compared to local Thais.

Thanks Freelancer.

So even $25K USD which is about annual 810,000 THB or monthly 64,000 THB is doable.  Nice.  I googled and found avg Thai monthly is approx 8,000 to 24,000 THB (wide range).

But you missed my real question   - how much to setup an exclusive MILF/mistress/friends with benefits type relationship?  Any guesstimates?


adrenal.

Probably 55-58 when I retire.

I didn't miss this. This idea just isn't realistic. Unless you can offer the girl A LOT of money, then what reason would she have to be exclusive to you at your beck and call? Girls like to have their freedom. No girl is going to want to be forced to drop whatever their plans are to rush over to your place because you're horny.

A freelancer in Bangkok I frequent, she makes over $200k USD a year. Just as a freelancer. She owns two condos and financially supports her parents and family. She has several wealthy sponsors across Asia. While still having the freedom to be on her own schedule.

What can you offer someone that she couldn't get elsewhere? What's the benefit for the girl in being exclusive to you?

Now if you met a girl and developed a long term relationship then that would be different. But it doesn't sound like you want that. Hence you should just budget for regular paid sessions.

I also didn't include previously that you have to budget for expected inflation. Thailand has no plans on being cheap for long.

IMHO steer clear of China. Although there are always exceptions,  Chinese women generally are greedy and selfish. Not a good combination. They expect to be given a lot and give very little in return.  I dated many Chinese women over a long period and without exception, they were all take and no give.

Japanese women typically do not express their thoughts and feelings. This can make any type of relationship with them difficult.

Filipino, Thai and Indo women make the best companions although Filipino women can be possessive. Indos are more flexible and open minded.

Agree. Not sure how many success stories there are on this type of arrangement. I would suggest not many.

Obe

"your comments on Chinese girls. I totally agree".


Can put a bag over an ugly girls face but can't put a bag over an ugly personality.

You need to be careful where you find a girl who would agree with this arrangement.

If you meet her at a "girlie bar", KTV or MP in Asia they will know many guys.
Will they stay exclusive to you? Or will they get cream on top (more cash) by visiting old clients without your knowledge?

If I was you I would just get a proper GF and lay down the ground rules that marriage will not be happening.

Obe