Just wanna to know how you guys feel about a gal being raped before.......what;s your acceptance level as friend, as Girlfriend and as Wife???


Many years back I met a gal who was a victim of rape and we were together for a while. But I find her very troubled emotionally and unable to let go the unfortunate event though I do not mind at all.........but it turn out to be a disaster relationship.

Your comment pls.

She was Chinese and had dated a Latino guy.  They were a couple for a few months and broke up.  He then went to her house when no one was around and asked for some stuff back, next thing you know she was raped.  They called the police, and the rest is a bit blurry because somehow this douche got away with it, he said she said thing.  

She was very submissive, very oral and very disturbed as well.  I could not put my finger on it but she was always trying to please me in some way or another.  I think she kinda overdid it and that is why I decided to cut it off, I was feeling a bit claustrophobic.  The reason why I did date her was because of her submissiveness, she would pretty much do anything to please me, the thing I miss the most was all the BJs anytime I wanted, even at the most inappropriate places.  I guess she felt that I was nice to accept that she was raped, but I could have cared less, I was there for the sex only.

"Disturbed" - yep that;s another word u can use........and the poor gal when they think back bout the incident, they felt dirty.........though almost like ur case the animal was someone she know.

This shit stuff just gonna haunt them for the rest of their life, it is up to them to let go.......

The way you've portraying youself as a ruthless, uncaring person is growing in every post you make ...

I don't buy that !  

[ Last edited by  twiceAweek at 15-2-2008 20:04 ]

Nothing ruthless, just being honest.  I was in it for the good sex and submissiveness.  It's not like I asked her to re-enact the rape scene or something.

You miss the point. 2/wk wasn't commenting on your honesty, he was judging your behaviour.

Honesty is a highly over-rated quality, by the way. All sorts of horrible people are quite up front about their behavior. Honesty doesn't keep criminals out of prison.

I was referring to your comment :
"I guess she felt that I was nice to accept that she was raped, but I could have cared less, I was there for the sex only."

I wasn't questioning your honesty (infact I see the honesty in your posts), I was observing how uncaring you tell us you
are towards all women other then your wife - not only in this thread but all your recent posts.
I said I don't buy that, simply because I believe every person has some decent moral fiber within themselves and
you chose not to show us that in your writing.

If Marsupial is the saint of 141, twiceAweek is the Dalai Lama

Been in similar relation (not rape, but some abusive man played on her emotional dependance and broke her).

One thing I would say is that playing the psychologist is a big nono. First, you are both too involved emotionally and second, as much as you want to think you can help, you are not a professional. Offer your support and gently suggest her to consult. If she do not feel ready for that, then it's your call ... She is the only one who can heal herself. Trying to compensate and putting everything on your shoulders is going to ruin your life and your relation in the end. Treat her like any other gf, just with more communication, patience and understanding than usual. If you see something strange in her behavior, telling her should help her realise it (she may not). In all case, don't abuse her condition and drop her coldly like some other person on this thread (what a jerk).

P.S. I know you said it was in the past, but writing in present was more easy and straightforward ;)

I saw a quote scribbled on a passageway wall  the other day:

Dalai Lama: My religion is simple, my religion is kindness.

That really made me stop and think.

Ah but 2/wk, you're contradicting yourself here; either he's honest or he's not.

I love all my female family members and would lay down my life for them or empty out every single cent if they ever needed it.  I do have those "old school Chinese" morals.  I do love some women, other than my wife, I have loved mistresses and some ex GFs, just not to the extent of the love I have for my wife.  

You have to understand, she's the one.  I would do anything for this woman even though I have had GFs and mistresses who have given me a lot more of themselves.  

Even though I cheat like crazy, doesn't make me love her any less.  

I guess it's just my "old school Chinese" side that keeps me the way I am.

I save my kindness, generosity and love for family members.  Wouldn't want to waste it on a 2 bit whore.

Dalai Lama ?  
I wish - not by a long shot !
But I do believe kindness to others is just as important as kindness to oneself !

I guess I am in a way ...
for what sexpert had previously written I have no doubt the actually feels that way
but I am sure there is another side to him that he hasen't really shown, be that it may
just be a very small part of his character !

Getting back on to the subject ...

I've personally never met any girl that had been raped but if I had, I would probably do
what I would do with any girl I meet:

If I liked her enough (WG or not), and I wanted to get involved, then I would lend my shoulders
for her to lean on and offer whatever support I can offer. I would like to think I
would take the time to do that unless I felt her emotional problems are beyond
my ability to cope. Acceptance ? - I think this is not a problem, main problem is if
I believe I can cope with her emotions.

If I met any girl that I am not interested in, then it will only be a one time encounter
and therefore a non issue.

[ Last edited by  twiceAweek at 16-2-2008 12:45 ]

Well 2/wk, now the mystery is all cleared up, and I think we owe bro sexpert an apology. It doesn't matter how much pain he causes others because, you see, he loves his wife. And all this time, we thought him a petty, callous, heartless little puss bag, when, in fact, he's just an Old School Chinese kind of guy.  2/wk, you're Chinese, how come you didn't recognize sexpert's total lack of compassion towards others as a classic expression of traditional Chinese values? Didn't you have to study this stuff in school?

(Isn't it just hilarious the stories we tell ourselves to justify our actions.)

[ Last edited by  Marsupial at 16-2-2008 23:56 ]

I'm not going to make more comments incase it inflames things.

Curious - you think I'm Chinese ???  

I was wondering about that comment. I didn't think you were Chinese. I mean, you run the
Jokes Section and we all know Chinese have no sense of humour.

Typical New England thinking.  Disagree with me and you are automatically some backwards Communist Chink.  That is some racist shit, we call it racial profiling in the US.  That shit don't fly on a Chinese website BRA!

Funny story:

Few years ago, some fat bitch with Massachusetts plates was taking her time because she did not know how to drive in NYC.  I honk at her and she screams at me, "I'm from BAH- STON! give me a break" so I tell her, "move you fat CUNT!".  She replies, "why don't you go back to your country?!"  I tell her, "this is my country! take a look around you dumb white bitch!"  Mind you we are in the middle of Chinatown and pretty much 30 square blocks of all Chinese.  She then drives up to a white cop and says I called her a fat white cunt and that she was from BAH STON!  I drove up next to them and yea, this bitch from BAH STON told me to go back to my country, she doesn't know that this is Chinatown, I guess she is stupid and blind.  The cop says to her, "why don't you drive your racist white ass back to BAH STON and get the fuck out of New York City"  LOL... she just drove off all mad n stuff.  But she didn't know that he was married to a Chinese girl from Chinatown and she happened to be my 2nd cousin.  

I see this shit from New Englanders all the time.  For some reason they like to call ALL CHINESE, "you guys"  like I was born under Mao's reign.