Guys, know it's unusual to have a woman talking here but I was wondering whether u guys can help me in getting my mind clear.... been going out with a guy for more than 2 years now, thought it was all good till I found out he used to go mongering in China before... and I think he does go still now... what's best in store is that he used to film his acts! Saw the videos and I can't get rid of those scenes from my head! Frankly, I think he treats those chicks better than he treats me in bed! F#$K!!! I do wonder sometimes whether he's treating me as one of them!!! Now, why does he still want to be with me and saying that he loves me but still want to fuck around??? Know as well that he post his stuffs in forums!

My options:

1. Tell him what I know (he doesn't know that I found out those stuffs and he's always been denying that he visited those chicks whenever he's in China) and dump him
2. Forget all these and I go around and have some good fuck too!!!

What advice can you give someone who's desperately looking for an answer?

We welcome female and everybody from all walks of life.

I am giving you the benefit of doubts on your statement.

Frankly I do not have a win-win answer for you.

I believe since you knew bout his secret hobby, might as well you go head to head with him to sort out things........same thing I will do if vice versa.
The longer you keep the truth to yourself, the more desperado you will be and you will not have peace of mind..........so that answer your Question 1.

Depend how he reacts and response, but truth is lots of guys do it but at the end of the day ..home is home and you are still part of his beloved and treasured family member.

Bout your sex life with ur hubby, no comment and u need to work out with him..............

We wellcome you to this forum, lots of bros will love to chat and console you in this situation......perhaps you might find the answer to your Question 2.......always a fair game.........

cheers.....

Totally agree with our Moderator Hunter

Firstly, welcome you sexybabe, I think you should try to open a topic with your partner, like a hint ....sort of a Miss A and Mr A story. And you will figured out if he had any response on it.......
But, frankly saying... you better face to face with him about it.

Secondly, do you really think of your 2nd choice to be your answer or the 1st choice.

Wish you a good luck !

Men are Hunters, Not Marsupial, caring, eseteric and a newbie to the fidelity kingdom.

If you live in Lantau buzz me, I can give you my piece of mind.

I vote #2

You write like one of us guys. So enjoy it like a guy.

BTW, how did you find this site and how you know he had posted?

[ Last edited by  unmask at 25-10-2007 11:09 ]

What? Huh? Eh? One can be both promiscuous and caring at the same time, Lantaubuff - there's no contradiction, as you well know. I just happen to love women - all of them.

All right, since I'm being forced to comment on the girl's situation, here are my 2 cents:

Sexyone, you already know about your guy's philandering and it bothers you. Nothing good is going to come of trying to go on as if nothing has changed; the dissatisfaction and sense of betrayal will begin to poison your life together. Women can never suppress such things for long. If the guy's at all sensitive, he'll sense somethings wrong and begin asking if everything is all right. At first you'll say there's no problem, etc.. Until finally during a fight, everything will come out.

Even if you decide you love the guy enough to put up with his whoring, you'll begin to resent being lied to, you'll never trust or belief anything he says, and eventually you'll stop loving him and wonder why you didn't leave him sooner.

You could decide to give the guy a taste of his own medicine and begin screwing around yourself, but my experience is that women have a harder time being promiscuous with multiple partners. Usually they find another lover and fall out of love with the first guy. But if you think you could enjoy that then give it a try. I know a lot of guys who would be happy to satisfy your sexual/romantic needs. But if you do that you'll lose respect for the guy and again fall out of love with him at the first difficult moment in your relationship. Women can never respect the guy they're cheating on.

You could confront him and demand that he give up visiting the working girls, but would you believe him if he agreed? Or would he promise and then become much more careful about hiding his activities. Keep in mind that men are incapable of being honest with women, even if they love them.

So my gut reaction is that the relationship is doomed, and it's just a matter of time.

If a guy wants to screw around, even if it's with prostitutes with whom he has no emotional connection, the first rule is NEVER let the women in your life have concrete proof. If she knows, all is lost. A guy is very capable of both loving his wife/girl friend and at the same time seeking the pleasure and excitement that comes with sex with different women. It's in our nature, part of what it means to be a man. If a guy tells you anything else it's bullshit.

Dear sexybabe,

take a deep breadth and start counting from 1 to 100.

There are plenty of options open to you.

Due to the nature of my culture, (if I was a woman), I would never confront but compromise.

Drop hints; and drop more hints;

Advice we can give but in the end, you are one who will be responsible for your actions.

Since you are not married to him, you should keep all options open.

Good Luck

ps love me love my dog

Question is whether or not you can accept his hobby. If you can, great. Live long and happy.

If you can't, you could confront him to make him change, but if he hasn't changed yet, chances are he's not going to. IMO you should leave him. Not doing so is just delaying the inevitable because you don't want to deal with the pain of breaking up.

Face up to reality and deal with the problem or else you'll never be happy.

Great post!  Yuo hit the nail on the head exactly!

For those of us who believe in the theory of evolution....It is a primeval thing.Men are hunters, wandering for days on ends to look for food, fighting with the elements, animals, strangers. Looting, plundering, raping and pillaging. At the end they go back to their home where the partners and the childrens are waiting for them. Acting as the perfect family man. Man have been conditioned this way.


Woman are at home, cooking, sewing, tending, caring, gossiping, waiting for their partners.It is rather difficult for the woman to be extramarital, if such is explored, this would mean blunt club on the head. They have been conditioned that way.

Now a days, the world has changed a lot. But the basic condition of survival is still the same. Woman as the home maker and raising the childrens, the man as the 'Salary Man' and balancing himself in the wilds....Even if the equation changes slightly, say the woman also working, childrens raised by the nanny; the woman is still the one who gives birth and the principal nurturer. The equation of the woman as the softer side is never changed. There has not been any paradigm shift in the family relationship and the attitude of Man and woman; we are still conditioned by our past, history.

The paradigm shift will be when the burdain of birth is forever lifted from the ladies, when childrens will be born in a test tube way, or similar. When Woman are released from the central cyclic existence. Then can history, human condition be changed forever.

There you have the collective wisdom of the all the lying, shameless womanizers that make up this forum here at a website devoted to the satisfaction of man's carnal desires, regardless of all ethical consideration. Not quite what the Vatican would suggest, but certainly more useful; for if you want to know what motivates the monger, who better to ask than another monger. That was quite astute of you Sexybabe - obviously you're a sharp girl!

I've given you my analysis of the emotional/psychological factors at play, and Lantaubuff has placed it all within the evolutionary context that has shaped our common natures.

You are not married, so legal advice isn't necessary.

It's up to you to reach a decision; or

(Why is it that I suspect that Sexybabe will turn out to be that prankster Koizumi in another of his disguises?)

in my opinion, if you are such a sexybabe, why does he have to go mongering?

blame the victim?

Ha, ha, ha....Marsupial....I had the exact same thought...maybe not Koizumi...but someone trying to be cute!
Having said that, I think we all have to keep in mind that men and women are wired up differently.....I have very few
female friends who are comfortable with multiple partners and very few men friends who are totally
monogamous.....c'est la vie....

I'm not convince this was written by a women.

Could just be a joke

Shemale  

  Still entertaining

"I found out he used to go mongering in China before."  
"those chicks"
"Forget all these and I go around and have some good fuck too!!! "

are the phrases that I find most suspicious in Sexybabe's post. Would a woman use the term 'mongering", call herself "Sexybabe", and use the beer smiley?

Exactly...that's my point...

the OP is not located in Hongkong when the post was made