The  phone rings and the lady of the  house  answers. "Hello?"

"Mrs. Sanders, please."

"Speaking."

"Mrs. Sanders,  this is Dr. Jones at St. Joseph's Laboratory. When your husband's doctor sent his biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now  uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good."

"What  do you mean?" Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.

"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the  other one tested positive for HIV. We can't tell which is  which."

"That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?" questioned Mrs. Sanders.

"Normally we can, but the new health care system will only pay for these expensive tests one time."

''Well, what am I supposed to do now? "

"The folks at Health Services recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town.  If  he finds his way home, don't sleep with him."

so in other words, either way, he's f_cked!