Some very good points given in the thread.

Never lie as a starting point is good, but if you need to lie then as little as possible.
BUT also it's good to know how to lie. As little as possible with face to face. Rememeber
women read us like open book. Of course they won't admid or even show that the lie
wasn't bought - means we pay later with extra's.

So lying is better by not personal sight, the body language is then not available. Means
phone, email, sms, ... but as little as possible. It's the cops way, ask the same happening 10
times and you have to remember to tell the story always at the same way!

As not from HK I have the situation where SO is thousands of km's away when I'm in SEA.
So no worries. Also I've over years worked out a routine that I'm not always available over
phone. No need to call her during my trips. Also she doesn't call me while somewhere there.
So no panic during session if my phone rings. Usually I don't have it on. As I have separate
local phone for China, HK, ...

We have separate credit cards, separate accounts, ... we don't touch other's phones or laptops.
When starting the relationship it makes sense to think a bit to future!

As a last reminder, study and learn what SO (women) is thinking. Many times it's better just to listen
and listen to them, no need to say anything (Then you don't lie, because you say nothing).

I used to think the same way as you - but I have changed my mind 100% as far as lying to preserve my marriage.

If you do NOT lie, even admit a little bit of indiscretion, all SO will not let it go and magnify the "sin" against her a thousand times over.   On top of that - and more importantly - once you admit to any affair/WG visits/adultery - no matter how temporary or meaningless, the SO is not going to have ANY more reason to give you the benefit of the doubt/have no more ground to stand to want to preserve the marriage.

So take it from me - lying to your SO is only doing a favour/a good thing for everybody concerned.

SEAN - yeah.... I know... I REALLY know!

I keep home base clean.

I don't monger in my own country. Have enough possibilities when travelling around the world
so I don't have most of the issues discussed here.

Also I see two types of lies. We need to make the white lies " SO ask does I look pretty in this dress,
the dress being her favourite we should say Of course darling you look sweet" and this does nothing
nothing to do of what we really think!

I have my area of freedom and SO has hers. We don't control the others goings and happenings.
No questions asked. She must know what is happening when I'm away.

If she'd ask I'd lie, but knowing how bad we are in that I'd do it in a minimal way.
Might be a cultrural diffrenece? I'd advise not to report everyday back home when you abroad.

There's no reason to have the mobile on all the time. Teach your friends that yoi also spend time in
places where you can't answer the phone. FInd new hobbies for excuses.

Yes, we need to lie, sometimes and white lies very often.

I don't get why you skip the bbbj. You'd rather stick your tongue in a WG pussy but you wouldn't stick your bare cock in her mouth? I mean what's the difference in terms of STD- chances  between your tongue in her mouth during DFK and your cock during a BBBJ?

there is some james bond shit advice here.  As TAW said, its takes the fun out of it & its overboard imo. I guess everyone has tons of advice here.

Sometimes the best advice is the simple ones.  No need for complicated coverups.  I'll add another advice to becareful of who you tell your irl friends.  Some have loose mouths & words get around.  Heck...some are probably trolling on the same sites you are on!

Here you are:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sex ... mission_probability

Supposedly, DATY is much safer than BBBJ. With BBBJ you can catch the same CTV and herpes as with DATY, but you can additionally catch Chlamydia, clap, UTI and syphilis (actually, I'm kind of surprised syphilis isn't listed under the section for DATY as well).

Anyway, I don't really find BJs all that great. Maybe I just need to go see Lily to be converted.

Just some of the things I do, maybe it helps....

A way to get extra cash.....  
Pick up another habit of buying lottery tickets (mark 6)  Tell her about it, show her the tickets every once in a while and ask her to check it for you.  Very often there are jackpots and just tell her you went and bought extra tickets to increase your chances.  This way once you get this going, just buy it once a month or something and siphon out the cash.  And if by some twisted luck that you do win on a ticket, MAKE SURE YOU TELL HER AND BUY HER A GIFT!!  That way, she will be ok and encourage you to continue this habit!  But prior warning, prize money can be checked easily, so dont buy her a $200 bottle of perfume if you told her you won 4 numbers and the prize is $4000!

If you have more than one phone that your partner don't know about....  
I've also started a habit of leaving my primary phone at home on occasions.  "Just left it on the charger and was in a rush to leave" this way if you are in Macau or China, it doesn't get that "roaming" tone when she checks up on you.

As for telling lies.........
I've also started a habit of using reverse psychology.  Just tell her every so often some lies/truths.  I've actually started telling her now at least 2-3 times a week that I went and got a happy ending massage or something similar, in a joke kinda way when in actual fact that you've done nothing but work.  Or if she asks "how was your day?" throw in some random answers like "yeah it was good, had lunch with a pornstar called Tiffany!"  After a while, she'll just hear BS, while in actual fact, they are truths.  I try to keep my lies stories revolving around the same imaginary names, like I frequent a masseur called Angel or a stripper name Amber,  or hooker called Tiffany.  So then everytime she hears these names, she'll immediately think of you BS-ing her again.  This takes a bit of time....

That's just my two cents.

I do this as well, but I think it really depends on the SO and her sense of humor.  

My SO has never had any trust issues before, so she is really relaxing with me.  But if a SO has been cheated on before, then they might not be so easy going.

I think common sense just has to prevail all the time and things should be fine.  

Just don't poon around with family and friends.  I don't know what some brothers are thinking when they go and play with this type of fire.

Also, I knew someone who went and blew over 15000 US dollars on a business trip, supposedly at the bars.  No SO is dumb enough to believe that.     

just my bit on this topic.

If you have a smartphone with facebook on it. It would be advisable to switch it off. Facebook has the possibility of showing exactly where you are in the city.

And i agree family is far more important. punting discreetly is the key. I  am lucky that i hold all the finances in the house so no way of tracking that.

I am a smoker so after punting i purposely smoke alot and onto my clothes so i smell like an ashtray by the time i get home. plus i use the soap provided by them only on my privates after i am finished. walking and getting sweaty also helps lol

... and if you have an iPhone, you're very vulnerable ...

at the very least make 100% sure you're not using "home sharing" and she has no knowledge of your iTunes account and password ... otherwise it's as simple as "find my iphone" and you're facing questions you're not able to answer

Smartone provides a 'stealth roaming' service, for a little fee your phone will give the standard hk ringing tone, wherever abroad you are.

Also:  monitor HER!  I installed some apps on her phone so I get see every sms she gets or sends.  Now, honestly, I have no concern that she's cheating on me.  I never felt any need to worry about.  (And after monitoring her chats for a few years I have even less reason to worry - damn girls are chatty and boring!).

Anyway, I did this (installed the spy apps) to get a preemptive "head's up" if one of her friends is talking about ME!  ("I saw Wander in Wanchai with 3 hookers and a midget last Thursday!"). That sorta stuff.   (PS: the midget was there purely to film the events.  Though we did toss him a few times.  Hehe).  

I gotta a very good mate here who joins me often for fun and games.  The problem is he doesn't really give a damn about getting caught.  His SO and my SO are best friends.  I tried a few times to tell him -  Mate, if you get nailed while you are out with me then I GET NAILED TOO!  I have been so close to getting crucified cause he won't delete sms's I sent when we lost each other in Wanchai and his SO reads them.  Fuck me!  Luckily, I send everything in "code" now to him so what she read made no sense.  

My point?

You can get caught by sources you never expected.  Your best friend can get you burned totally by accident.  So think about every message you send within your family "circle".  Accidents happen - and they can be marriage-ending.

Ah!

I wondered how it was you got those waist-level shots!!

Hahaha, You are such a jerk... spying on your wife
Btw, could you tell me what app you are using?

That's dedication. I wouldn't have thought of that.


JFC, you are fucking nuts. I would sooner forgo sex than have someone rip out all my pubes. I have two words for you: 'beard trimmer'

BTW, what did your wife say about the wax job? Or about the sudden desire to go hairless after all those years? That's almost a tip-off right there!

* No 2 SIM phone.  One phone for everyday, One phone ONLY for mongering.  That stays in office (or secret place).  It stays off until booty call. haha

* You aint' getting away with anything if you come home smelling like you just had a shower.  

* Wash face to get glitter off your face/neck/hands/arms.  Glitter on a girl's face is the death of any monger.  Trust me, those glitter are hard as hell to get off so hopefully, if the girl has glitter, make sure none gets on your skin.

Actually, getting away with mongering is hella easy.

It's hiding from affairs that are hella hard.

WGs are great for the once in a while romp.

Affairs, well, those require more time and maintenance.  Both have advantages and disadvantages, but if one is willing to spend time and money, it's not so bad.

party on.

Wander makes an interesting point. You may control what you do or say, but when you start mongering with others it gets tricky. I have made it an explicit point that this is a solo hobby for me. Nobody who knows me IRL knows I monger, andI am keeping it that way. There is just too much opportunity for trouble. Your mates today may be someone else tomorrow...

Closest I ever got to giving myself away was when some office mates convinced me to go down to OT in Singapore just for drinks and fun, and I got drunk and had a PRC girl start DFKing me in the bar. I had to pass it off as a sort of oh my godwhat did I do, how did you let me get so drunk thing. Little did they know, I was in Wanchai the week before knee deep in WG pussy. Hopefully they bought it. But even so, I worry I have aroused suspicion. And some of my work mates have wives who are friends with my SO... Dangerous ground there.

Yah bad news. I have mongered with others only to regret it. Your impression of discretion and another persons are not always the same thing. So if you have a lot to lose you need to control your own destiny, not leave it for someone else.

Even if they're not openly saying shit they can let little things slip, or deviate from the story enough to poke holes in alibis, or start making comments they figure can be taken 2 ways but mostly the 'safe' way like: You should hang out with Bill at Bar ABC next time you are in Shekou. WTF, dumb fuck????!

In any case my mongering is getting harder since too many people in China know both me and my SO. I've got one or two more crazy benders with 8 girls in one week left in me......then I'll have to start being really careful. The tips in this thread are great, but I need to hide from just more than my SO. Anyone have a cloak of invisibility?

... and actually you may not

Seen reports of bros who accidentally spoke someone else's name during sex with an SO (and quickly tried to talk their way out of it by 'admitting' to a fantasy for a porn movie)

And another report of a bro who talked in his sleep.  Even more scary that one, as you will never know what you said.   

Really good habit to develop is to use the same pet-name for everyone, especially during sex.  NO first names under any circumstances whatsoever.  That way a slip up is that bit less likely.

You have to police not just your appearance (and smell, and habits)
not just your words (what you say to who)
but also your thoughts

I read this thread and laugh.  We are so frickn bad!  Haha.  

Essentially, we live double lives:  at least those of us with SO's and monger a lot.  It DOES get complicated.  I exert a lot more energy than I should to the task of not getting caught.  That energy and creativity could have made me a billionnaire, methinks, but instead -- I just get laid often.  Hmmm.  Works for me!  Haha.

And Yes, that glitter is a killer!!  Fuckn clown makeup!

[ Last edited by  wander at 27-6-2012 14:36 ]