SEAJ (***Call me Sean Sweet Swede***)
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Post at 12-4-2011 12:11  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #18 wander's post



QUOTE:
Hell, every WG I've taken to dinner or drinks ALWAYS say thanks, and say it like they mean it - and these are Asian girls too, so I don't buy the "cultural" arguement at all.  They are just not into you and showing it by being rude.

And.... therein probably lies the truth.  

Every WG?   Ahhhh....!
Not into you?.... Ahhhh!

SEAJ

[ Last edited by  SEAJ at 12-4-2011 13:13 ]

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wander   12-4-2011 15:52  Acceptance  +1   ?? Confused.




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wander
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Post at 12-4-2011 15:37  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #21 SEAJ's post

Hmm, maybe I shoulf have expanded my post - I have taken many civvie asian girls out for dinner or drinks aswell -some I was already screwing and some I wanted to but hadn't.  In almost all cases they were gracious enough to thank me for the meal ior drink.  In a few cases they didn't - and also acted cold in other respects - they were not into me and not civilized enough to least remember their manners.  Bye bye.  I recall leaving one in the bar - just got sick of her cold attitude and got up a walked out,
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UncleDad
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Post at 13-4-2011 08:11  Profile Blog P.M. 
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There's no such thing as equality....especially in Hong Kong.
There's a term that I'm surprised nobody's brought up yet. ....港女...(hong)kong-girl...aka....honger girl...which is, imho....a more materialistic form of princess sickness... and more appropriate for far too many girls in HK.

~UD
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halfclover
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Post at 13-4-2011 09:39  Profile P.M. 
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If you aren't happy to pay then you shouldn't. I would be mighty pissed if there wasn't a simple thank you even if I was previously happy to pay.

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chelu   13-4-2011 14:36  Acceptance  +1   fool me once shame on you, fool me
wander   13-4-2011 12:39  Acceptance  +1   Agree
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doghead (dog)
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Post at 13-4-2011 16:05  Profile P.M. 
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In all my years of going out and socializing in HK, you cannot predict if someone will be well-mannered and generous from looking at the person's occupation, physical appearance, educational background, social class, ethnicity, gender, and salary. I have met many (I think 1/4 of the LKF party crowd belong in this group) moochers of all types. HK just seems to either breed or attract many people who only know how to live off or party off the generosity of others.

Now you ask, how can these moochers get away with their behavior? Well, many of the generous ones were taught by their family to be generous, well-mannered, a good sport, to be helpful and respectful to others, and most importantly not to judge relationships in monetary terms (or 'what can I get of this' terms). Unfortunately many of these ppl didn't receive proper teaching on when to 'turn off' the tap if their generosity is being abused as this is very difficult to teach and is best learned from experience.

I guarantee you will be still abused by others until you have gained enough experience to know when you should 'dump' those ppl and move on. Hopefully you do not swing to the other side and become cheap and moocher as well from your bad experience. If you swing to the other side, I predict in the long run, you will be unhappy as you eventually get ostrasized by others.

I personally don't mind buying a round or two for ppl I just met or taking ppl into to clubs so they can bypass the line. But when it comes to their turn to get me a drink because I bought them one earlier or got them in, and they do not, then I walk away.  It doesnt matter if the girl is hot or not, I still walk away and rationalize it like if the girl is selfish then she must suck in bed.

One more thing, some moochers are smart and know only to ask for 1 drink or 2 then disappear into the crowd of a club and repeat over and over on subsequent visits. For these types of moochers, you will have to have a great memory to remember if they ever got you a drink or not.

Or some moochers try to appeal to your manhood and flatter you as they know many guys like to act like the big man on campus. So you have to keep buying if you want to be the big shot. In this case, you have to show self-confidence and tell the girls to find someone else to buy them a drink or walk away.   

In the end, if you demonstrate your unwillingness to be cowed into buying drinks, after already done so, for fear being judged cheap or 'little man', the moochers will show you great respect afterwards.

Here is a personal experience of mine.
One time my bud and I were hanging out with some girls we knew as moochers in Beijing Club. They always bug us for drinks which we sometimes order and sometimes not. This time I got them 1 round as one of them was quite attractive looking.

As the club was dying down, we asked the girls to come with us to Volar as I wanted to see if we could get anywhere with the attractive one. They were hesitant as they knew it is hard to get in to Volar. We assured them it was no prob. So we go down and get into Volar and continue our chatting in Volar.

As we chatted with the attractive one, the other girl was chatted up by another guy. They ordered 2 shooters. Then the other guy disappears. While he is away (toilet, dancing in other room, chatting another girl, etc?), the shooters arrive and the bartender lays down the bill. 5 mins later, the other guy has not returned yet, the bartender is getting impatient and asks the other girl to pay for the shooters.

She does not want to pay for the shooters, so she gives me the bill and ask me to pay. The nerve of this girl! She wanted me to pay for drinks some other guy (I dont know) ordered for just the two of them. I told her 'no', gave the bill back to her, then immediately with my bud left the girls behind in Volar with the shooters and unpaid bill. I think we went to sauna afterwards.

We never knew if the other guy ever came back or not as he could have just disappeared himself as it was late. We never knew who paid for the bill. But in the end when we saw those girls again in Beijing weeks later, they avoided us. They never again ever dared to ask us for drinks.

So in the end, maintain your self-respect and don't let anyone cow you into keep buying drinks/meals beyond what is fair.

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bmberman   13-4-2011 18:04  Karma  +2   well said!
bmberman   13-4-2011 18:04  Acceptance  +2   well said!
wander   13-4-2011 16:14  Acceptance  +1   Some nerve indeed! Classless...
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bmberman
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Post at 13-4-2011 18:03  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #20 rajrammer's post

I call bullshit on this women's rights equality thing.

I work in the silicon valley and its about 6-8 guys to 1 girl.  EVERY company I've seen has a few girls who got a certain role because they "flirt" with someone along the chain of command. They are playing the game well to their advantage.

[ Last edited by  bmberman at 13-4-2011 18:08 ]
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UncleDad
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Post at 14-4-2011 00:44  Profile Blog P.M. 
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Reply #26 bmberman's post

Absolutely bullsh*t.

Tell a girl to bake you a pie, and i'm a f*cking sexist pig..
Tell a girl the change the oil in their car....that's a GUY'S job. =)~

The trailer park can be a microcosm of society =)~


~UD
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chelu
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Post at 15-4-2011 14:59  Profile P.M. 
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Ah yes, life is unfair

Ah, yes life is unfair, but I'll tell you what:

I WOULD RATHER BE A GUY ANY DAY!!



Che'lu
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mchk
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Post at 19-4-2011 19:11  Profile P.M. 
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Just to clarify, I was 99% sure I wasn't getting laid that night, and I was fine with that.   I was also pretty sure I was going to pay for most of the drinks that night, and I was OK with that as well.  It was just the lack of gratitude that threw me off.

Excellent learning experience, and thanks for everyone's input.

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chelu   20-4-2011 09:45  Acceptance  +1   They were such ungrateful bitches!
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changkee
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Post at 20-4-2011 22:24  Profile P.M. 
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Hmm... So far my HK friends of the opposite sex are way mores decent and will offer to pay the bill, unless i decline. I do agree there is a lot of HK gals out there that do expect their BFs, bosses or even more senior colleagues to pick up the tab. Unless saving "face" is the priority, do ask to split the bill after and I don't think anyone will say "no" to that. Of course, there are the stuck up ones...
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changkee
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Post at 20-4-2011 22:27  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #21 SEAJ's post

I basically don't mind paying for WGs as I know they work hard and appreciate the money they make. I do have 1 or 2 favorite WGs that I will buy drinks or snacks when I visit them. Small things do go a long way, if you catch my drift. They are humans after all and some TLC makes for a win-win situation ;)
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