Asking questions about safety issues has always been a controversial issue
in this forum … it has lead to heated debates, flaming and sometimes even disinformation.

Perhaps this might be the right time to discuss if its in the best interest of
this forum to stop all discussions on this topic.

Your comments will be appreciated …

yes stop it. We're all fucking adults. We know the risks. Everyone has an opinion and i find these STD threads always gets like 80 responses and it takes forever reading everyones responses.

I absolutely agree with that. Many bros are prepared to accept different levels of risk and, IMHO, their
personal choices should be respected. I have quite conservative views and what really got me posting
on this subject was the feeling that, what I consider to be unsafe sexual activities were being actively
promoted and that bros with conservative views were being ridiculed.

OTOH, if someone is engaging in BB Vaginal or Anal Sex, which are known to be hazardous, I think
a standard warning from the moderators might be appropriate. I think this forum, within reason,
should try to promote safe sex.

[ Last edited by  pisser at 26-1-2010 19:48 ]

Advocating something is "safe" or "unsafe" is not the job of a forum like this, we are simply not qualified to respond. Hell, you could ask qualified people and get differing views anyway.

However discussing issues such as how much different (in terms of transfer of an STD) DATY is than DFK allows members to put forward their opinions. PROVIDING they are accepted as opinions only and nothing more, I think that's fine.

Rules regarding flaming and victimization that apply to all threads should also apply to STD discussions. In that case I dont see a problem but that's just my opinion.

I hope you will edit your reply  - delete everything from your first paragraph downwards
or the whole reply will be deleted for you.

Do not use this thread to carry on your Oscar winning tiff with Mars !

This is a serious question and bros here needs to give their serious opinions

IMHO that's too subjectibe and mods will have to make a value judgement everytime ...
no grey areas ... its either we allow this type of discussion or we don't allow

I don't think we should stop discussing STD's.

Yes, we really shouldn't flame people or make attacks on individual preferences, as bro pisser said: Many bros are prepared to accept different levels of risk and, IMHO, their personal choices should be respected.

However, STD's are a very real and very dangerous risk in our hobby; any well researched insight on the topic would benefit everyone as there is a lot of mis-information out there. If we can dismiss potentially harmful misinformation, we could potentially save a bro (or bros) from contracting a life altering disease like herpes or HIV.

It would be harmful if we avoided these topics; I think that we should just police the discussions so that they don't get diverted into personal attacks. Maybe setting discussion guidelines when posting on the topic would be helpful.

Twice, I know it may seem a bit overly restrictive to some bros but I like how you're monitoring this discussion. Flame wars like the one that's obviously going on just hurt the overall goal of these STD threads, to inform and prevent the spread of STDs.

And Mars...


I don't think it's right for you to ridicule someone over their fears of STD's.

Fear of ridicule and shame is the reason that people are scared to discuss these topics in public. A board like this, where bro's can openly inquire about things that they are too nervous to ask in public, doesn't only help punters, but everyone in general.

I get that you like to generate discussion from picking apart people's posts and lord knows I've gotten a lot of laughs out of it, but please exercise some sensitivity when it comes to this topic. Not everyone is as well read as you and by ridiculing a questioning bro, you may be deterring another one from posting a potentially helpful question.

I think it's irresponsible of members here to spout their own private little theories on STDs / HIV, which lead to so much misinformation that we may be doing more harm than good.

Let's just put up a permanent sticky to http://www.cdc.gov/STD/

I'm sure they are far more correct than any guessing or anecdotes from us.

Or create a little FAQ and link to their pages, it would be a much better service i think.

Hey Twice, I agree with 56.  

I think it would be a major shame if STD's were shut down as a topic.  This forum meets a wide range of important functions, and one of them is to promote safe legal and consensual sex.  

I think there are smarter ways to handle the issue of undisciplined debate than to have a blanket ban.  

Your Fight Club is an excellent idea, for example.
Another suggestion is to be more proactive with moderation.
Or maybe make interminable discussions a higher RA.

Of course a complete ban on the topic is the ultimate sanction, even if it's only temporary, but we should definitely implement other less extreme measures first.

... adding #10 Thou Shalt Not Discuss STDs would be a very strange inclusion in the 9 ways to foul up ...

... better to broaden the definition of flaming to include a wider range of inflamatory writing ... inflammatory is as inflammatory does ...

I'm also of the opinion that the conversation about STD's should be allowed to continue.  The altercation that sometimes ensues is less about that topic and more about trying to win an argument, and that can happen with any topic.  The subject of STDs however is very relevant to this hobby and even if this place isn't a definitive source it helps to have a place to discuss the subject, refer others to useful information one's found or help another bro get a sense of perspective on the issue.

Agree.

And you make a good point that it's actually not about STDs at all.  The underlying issue is about how we get to the facts, how we handle disagreement, and how we come to a new and more sophisticated understanding as a result.  STDs often provoke a disagreement because of the sensitivity and pivotal importance of the topic and also because of the difficulty of finding objective data that's not biased by an underlying agenda.  

SO ... I also feel that "duelling" should be allowed ...
Actually I'll stick my neck out and say categorically I think it should even encouraged, since it keeps us fit and on our toes and discourages sloppy thinking.

But perhaps there should be a house rule about escalation.  Something like "if you exchange more than 3 off-topic ripostes in a thread, take your argument to the Fight Club".  

That way neg K could be used as an incentive, not to take sides, not to evaluate the merits (or demerits) of the argument, but simply as a message that the argument is creating a nuisance.  

STDs are an important topic
Debate and argument create a great deal of value to the members
... in addition to which we do need to be respectful on the impact we're having on others

A television show in the US with a Dr as a host and lots of experts who come visit the show daily.  They were talking about Teen Sex in the USA and this STI expert said, BBBJ and BBFS have the same exact list of STI's you can catch.  This kinda scared me because I love and get BBBJ all the time.  I am sure the chances are slimmer but the fact that you CAN catch the same exact shit, even with cases of HIV, mind you bleeding gums but still, how can u tell?  If the chick rinses with salt water, u cant see the bleeding gums until its too late?  geez... scary thought.

just wondering what happened to Mars's responses regarding this thread?

Reply  #14 venetiangirls's post:
He deleted them because he agreed his and pisser's current disagreement was getting this thread off topic.

Reply  #13 sexpert's post:
I wish i could quote this, but BBBJ is one of the leading causes of Genital Herpes. I'm a massive BBBJ fan too! This is always on my mind when I'm with a WG and one of the reasons why I still chase non-WG tail during the weekends!  

All I could find was this link from the Centre of Disease Control:
http://www.cdc.gov/std/herpes/STDFact-herpes.htm


And don't forget!!! To quote the CDC:
There is no treatment that can cure herpes, but antiviral medications can shorten and prevent outbreaks during the period of time the person takes the medication.  In addition, daily suppressive therapy for symptomatic herpes can reduce transmission to partners.

Mars, twisted my words around. I NEVER said I don't DFK my wife/girlfriend.  I said it not safe to kiss a working girl because of all the potential diseases. I am paranoid about STD and any other disease, Mars is not.   

Yes, I also don't think it's right to ridicule someone over anything that the other person disagrees on but Mars loves to do it.

( Someone deleted my post from yesterday or I didn't posted it. )

This is just my opinion.

[ Last edited by  Weelock at 27-1-2010 11:51 ]

You dumb shit Weelock. The mods removed all those posts for a reason. And they'll remove them again, but here is the post I made in response to your whinging:

Not so!

in post #64 you said, "No DATY or DFK doesn't mean it was not a GFE. Most Chinese guys and girls don't even like to DATY or DFK.  This is even true with their girl friends and wives."

in post #66, I said, "If your girl friend or wife (implied but unstated are the words: who you won't DATY or even DFK) would like to experience, at least once in her deprived life, what's it like to be properly fucked, send her around."

it was only in post #67, after my comment, that you qualified your original remark with, "Most Chinese guys/girl don't care for DATY. For DFK is fine, if she is your girlfriend/wife."

And as became obvious later, when I made my comment in post #66, I thought you were Chinese. in any case,  my comment was clearly aimed at your previous statement in post #64.

[ Last edited by  Marsupial at 27-1-2010 12:05 ]

Twice deleted your post from yesterday because we're trying to cull irrelevant finger pointing...as you can see, the discussion is over.

The bros are trying to have an intelligent and informed open conversation about whether we should have STD posts on this board.

I've read that 80% of Americans have already had Herpes as children, so the virus is already in our bodies but dormant. Those cold sores we all suffer from at some time in our lives are, in fact, Herpes. I had a few periodic episodes of recurring cold sores as an early teen but they went away on their own and it's been 40 yrs with no sign of them.

[ Last edited by  Marsupial at 27-1-2010 12:15 ]

I dont think those herpes are the same as the genital types. Those are milder forms of the strain and those can be cured but gential herpes can't. Im no doctor but that's what I gather from various books and internet sources