Originally posted by mrfast at 12/3/11 08:47 AM
Following all the posts about lasting longer, I have decided to try edging and controlling the PC muscles. My new year resolutions is to be able to continuously pump for at least an hour. Wish me luck ...
Serious response ahead.
I admit that I used to have a problem with premature ejaculation. It took me a few years to figure out why and how to solve it.
First, I tried controlling my pubococcygeus (PC) muscle. This is the muscle which control your flow of urine -- not to be confused with the muscle that prevents you from farting or shitting. The point of this control is that when you feel yourself at the urge of cumming, you hold back on this muscle so that you don't cum. You can practice this by masturbating or fucking (oral/vaginal/anal whatever) until you're getting close and then exercise control on the PC muscle.
Second, I tried the "stop and start" method. This is where you bring yourself to near orgasm (however method you prefer), then stop and let yourself cool down. The point is to be aware of your own body and senses to be able to know when you're approaching the point of no return.
Third, I tried the desensitizing method. You can masturbate and orgasm before actual sex or you can use desensitizing creams/sprays/jels. I would not recommend using any desensitizing creams/sprays/jels because you won't ever learn self control this way and also you may accidentally get the cream on your hands or on the girl. More importantly, sex is not fun if you're not getting any pleasure. Banging away for 30 minutes will just tired out and annoy the girl. Seriously, it's better to have 1 minute of pure pleasure than 30 minutes where you feel nothing. I've read that the optimal duration for intercourse is 6-12 minutes before any woman gets tired and bored. Nobody will care if you can bang away for 15, 20 or 30 minutes. It's not a long distance race. I even get bored after I've been banging away for more than 15 minutes. I would prefer two "short time" orgasms than one "long time" banging session in the same duration of time. Masturbating before sex is similar but it depends on your own refractory period. If you can get hard again soon after then no problem, but remember that ultimately your goal is to know your own body and sensations.
Fourth, I tried to stop masturbating. This actually proved to be the second best method and actually a massage girl recommended this to me. She said I cum too fast from a woman's touch because I always masturbate and it was true. Too much wanking causes your body and brain to become maladjusted to the sensation of your own hand. Either you won't be able to cum without using your own hand or you'll cum too quickly when someone touches you. Either way is bad. I still download porn online but pulling out my dick for a wank is rare. My desire for long term self control was stronger than my desire for immediate masturbation. You may also want to cut down on your porn watching as well because it creates an unrealistic image of women in your head that can't be met by someone in real life. Porn is acting and real life sex won't reflect that. Watch it for personal enjoyment but don't become dependent on it.
Fifth, I began having more sex. I got myself a girlfriend and she happened to enjoy sex as well. We were fucking almost every single day. Over the weeks and months, because sex was a regular thing and not a special reward for myself when I would see WGs, I had time to feel every sensation and become used to it. Now I almost can cum whenever I want whether it be after 2 minutes or after 10 minutes. I just think it and BAM!! Jizz comes flying out!
Sixth, and this relates to all of the notes above, premature ejaculation is all mental. If you go in worrying that you'll cum in 20 seconds then that's exactly what will happen. Don't think about it at all. Just enjoy the time spent. Remember, it's not a competition because no one cares how long you can last.