The Hitman
Two old friends were just about to tee off at their golf course when a
> guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join
> you? My partner didn't turn up."
>
> "Not a problem," they said, "Come join us."
>
> They began play and enjoyed the company of the newcomer.
> Part way around the course, one of the friends asked, "What do you do
> for a living?"
>
> "I'm a hit man," was the reply.
>
> "You're joking!" both friends responded.
>
> "No, I'm not," he said, as he reached into his golf bag, pulling out a
> beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here
> are my tools."
>
> "That's quite a sight," said the one friend, "I think I might be able
> to see my house from here."
>
> He picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction
> of his house.
>
> "Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can
> see right through the window. I can see my wife in the bedroom and
> she's naked! Wait, that's my neighbour in there with her...He's naked,
> too! The bit*h!"
>
> He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"
>
> "I do flat rate, one thousand dollars every time I pull the
> trigger."
>
> "Can you do two for me now?"
>
> "Sure, what do you want?"
>
> "First, shoot my wife. She's always been mouthy, so shoot
> her in the mouth. Then the neighbor. He's a friend of mine, so just
> shoot his dick off to teach him a lesson."
>
> The hit man took aim with the rifle, standing perfectly still for a
> couple of minutes. Time dragged by.
>
> "Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.
>
> "Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think I can save you a
> grand here!"
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