I want to share something which has been happening to me recently, and also to see if any other bros in marriages or have steady GFs have had similar experiences... More importantly, I'm looking for advice on how to deal with this unfortunate side-effect of mongering...

Over the past couple of months, I've been getting horny in the middle of the night, dreaming about getting it on with WGs (usually they're unidentifiable ones, but often the context is a line-up type sauna like those in Macau...) What happens is I start touching up the wife and come on strongly, waking her up and getting her all horny as well. As we kiss and fondle, I slowly wake up and that's when I realise the girl I'm getting into action with is the wife!

This has scared the shit out of me each time, because it's so damn dangerous. I mean, what if I come out with something bad (like "So what's your tag number again?", "Em diep lam...", "Let's skip the ice-fire, baby." etc.), or if I called her a different name!?!?

So, anyone want to share or comment on this?

Heh as I said to a few padwans recently you have to remember not to get your wallet,

I think as a diversionary tactic you should start calling her different names , this is based entirely on a joke I once heard:

A man was invited for dinner at a friend's house. Every time the host needed something, he preceded his request to his wife by calling her "My Love", "Darling", "Sweetheart", etc., etc. His friend looked at him and said, "That's really nice after all of these years you've been married to keep saying those little pet names." The host said, "Well, honestly, I've forgotten her name."

Considering tons of the WGs have strange names anyway , (to a westernised person like me) then I think it is an excellent cover,

I can see your dlilemma.  I haven't experienced that, but I have become more horny during the times I am with the wife and found myself waking her in the middle of the night for some action.  This has raised some questions from her about WHY????  but that has been easy to handle.  

    I can't answer your question but I can tell you're too much into WGs at the moment !  

Take a rest ... away from all women ... recharge yourself .... go to a remote farm in Oz and stay there for a few weeks !

I'd pity the sheep, the cows, the racoons, the kualas......  

hmm.. that's why me and my wife sleep in different rooms...
i tend to talk in my sleep..

so whenever i come back from punting sessions.. (which make me talk abt it at night when i sleep)
i say i drank too much liquor with my clients....
which heats up my body...
so not appropriate to take a shower.. might get sick easily..
my wife never lets me onto the same bed, if i have not showered..

don't you love those chinese traditions ... fung shui ... hot/cold ... SO useful for crafting excuses!!  

the solution to that bit is obvious!!!

Yes, most important thing is to watch your language with the WGs - make sure you don't say things you wouldn't want to use at home, that way you avoid developing a habit that could get you into a corner.  And vice versa, make sure you DO use language at home you might want to apply on a WG.  Should broaden your married life nicely too ...

Then there's also that idea floated around that you should treat your whores like a lady, and your wife like a whore ... should give some ideas ...  

Do you ever role-play with your wife?  How would she react if you asked her to act out being a whore?  If she likes the idea, it would give you the perfect cover for possible future tongue-slips ... you could even pay her for real ... like in the movie 9 1/2 Weeks ...

You must be kidding!!.  Did you ask your wife to be a whore? unless you're looking for trouble, I wouldn't do that!

Can you handle it, if she ask you to act out being the neighbour or Gigolo?

that's is one unbelievable advice I've ever heard.

OMG...do you mean you actually get on with it in your sleep. I've seen a documentary on it where people drive, have sex and even commit murder while asleep.
Do you take sleeping pills? There's an issue with 1 brand which makes people do all kind of crazy things in their sleep.
Maybe you are just overflowing with hormones. If that's the case you better do double time with the WGs before you go home.
As for me, it's never happened to me before. Take care and I hope you don't incriminate yourself when sleeping next to your wife.  

Thanks, I like to impress!!

... I've been surprised more times than I can remember by what couples get up to ... must be getting old ... but agree that it's tough in HK, the fillies are especially skittish ...

I've never had those types of wake-up close calls by mentioning WG terms but when you have a mistress on the side, ones that you courted into your bed, you tend to mumble dangerous shit too.  Luckily for me I call everyone baby or babe.  I have half woken in a dream state and said, "Baby, I miss you so much"  usually what I tell my mistresses whenever we chat on the phone or online.  My wife asked me the next morning who I was missing and I told her that I dreamed that I was away on business and that I missed her and the kids.  That was the beginning of my realization that having a mistress wasn't all it was cracked up to be.  I only rock WGs now, but I've had quite a few mistresses/GFs in my day and it's fun at first but eventually you grow tired of them and try to figure a way out of the relationship.

Exactly what I'm fearing, that I'll say stuff that she'll question... I'm not so worried about calling her funny terms of endearment (baby, honey, sweetie, etc) since I call her a real mix bag of terms usually anyway. It's calling her a specific name, or bring up phrases or contexts that are obviously brothel or sauna related that I worry about!

I feel you man, I was quite shaken up when it happened to me too.  Luckily, I was quick on my feet, but I certainly was not prepared and only remembered what happened in the middle of the night the second she asked.  Not fun at all my man.

My wife enjoys talking to me when Im asleep..unfortunately I reply back to her in my sleep.
The trick I use is to blank out my escapade, fill up my head with my sporting hobby for 3 hours until I get to bed. It seems to work because the next day my wife will tell me I have been sleep talking about poker/football etc.

Sorry CL....I can't really relate...

But I guess you should think of a few excuses and keep them handy!

C, I've never had that problem ..... I would know if I blabbed in my sleep as I would have been subject to interrogation techniques too severe to mention in this forum.

To stop mongering may make it worse .... imagine all that pent up "want", spilling out in your (wet) dreams?

The role play suggestion may have some merit, but I think it's quite limited and a personal matter which only you know how far you can take. As you already know some practices like fire/ice can be reversed, to some extent, so you could actually "ice" her first ..... if she asks you could say you were inspired by a letter in a mainstream men's mag. I may try this myself as I think my wife would probably enjoy this but I would be careful to do it at one of those special moments like when you whisk her away for that special weekend, when Wife expects the unexpected.

Anyway, I think it could easily back-fire, like "how the hell do you know the WGs have tag numbers SWEETHEART!!".

C, really hope things go well for you on this, quite a dilemma.

Btw old bean, very impressed with your marriage, nice to hear of a wife being receptive to the wee hours wake up call of the wild, legend!

one way that may get you out of this is to try some sort of role play w/ your wife...or do some things that are currently out of your norm...do it a few times, occasionally, then it becomes the new norms!

on the nights that you wake up fondling your wife...take it to the next level and finish her off!! that way you set a new precedent with her on making love.  and once you do this a few times, she won't think your actions are strange...reverse psychology my friend!!

not sure if this will work but trying cannot hurt??

I do finish what I start! It's just the initial coming round moments that are scary... once awake, there's no stopping the bopping!

I remember my ex-wife saying I talked as if I was at work back 10 years ago. I was imagining SpecialK's wife actually getting out all the secrets she wanted and just telling him he talked about poker and football.


Reading this thread got me curious...
I looked a little around and found this frightening post somewhere:
http://www.experienceproject.com/stories/Talk-When-I-Sleep/5906