Subject: Falling for a WG
Bluemeanie
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Post at 30-11-2012 01:18  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by b-man at 29-11-2012 14:17
Amazing what 24 hours brings with love!  She is now saying to choose one or the other!  It's only been 4 weeks we have been seeing each other!!!! It's way too soon to start this and she is alread ...

That's pretty hardcore. Only u can know I suppose but that ultimatum would have me running.
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slimshanks
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Post at 30-11-2012 12:03  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #18 b-man's post

Wander is right!  RUN!  There are plenty of beautiful Wanchai girls that will not pull this ultimatum stuff so quickly. I also bet that if you blow her off a little her tune will change if she has true feelings for you.
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sexysax
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Post at 30-11-2012 12:04  Profile P.M. 
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Speaking from experience, if you don't want to be scammed, don't walk away, RUN!

my bro married a thai woman who worked in one of those goldfish bowl brothels like Posidon. Married her and got her to HK. She asked for money several times with my bro being the 'let's give her the benefit of the doubt' attitude.

1. Her brother killed someone on a motor accident. He needs bail and bribe money to get off the hook.
2. Her uncle wants to run for mayor for his town. Needs money to run campaign...creative shiat...
3. She has brain cancer. Called my bro a couple times and said she fell down on the street collapsed and such for half an hour. Told my bro she only wants it done in thailand where its more 'trusted'. Bro got verified reports from a thai doctor. Came back from thailand with all her hair and no scars.
4. Had a baby. Baby looks nothing like my bro and much darker. It wasn't until they wanted a divorce later,wanting half of everything did my brood a DNA test to find out the baby is not his!

i'm sorry i'm popping all your balloons and pissing on your parade here. I've had 2 working girls as gf and they tell me what they think. But the absolute fact which most of you aren't able to relate to is, its not easy for them to fall in love. they been there and done that x10^23. Their faith is low and they only trust money cause men can't be trusted ultimately.

You might think you have the upper hand but trust me, you don't unless you're brave enough to cut ties. best way to cut ties? fall in love with another woman!

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troyman2011   1-12-2012 00:00  Acceptance  +4   Totally agree had many GF type WGs and they see me as opportunity and act innoce ...
wander   30-11-2012 14:04  Acceptance  +1   Yep. Any longtime WG finds a "normal" relationship almost impossible.
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b-man
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Post at 1-12-2012 16:34  Profile P.M. 
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Well I have an update.

First of all she is not a WG. Though we met in Neptune she is not. Admittedly I was there looking but she never asked for anything.

Anyway I told the wife last night and came to agreement that 1 year to see if it's right. It was emotional after 10 years with the all the photos on the wall and I can say I'm a complete asshole but I'm not prepared to to live a loveless marriage that she was prepared to have.   I cannot believe what Chinese women will accept. I thought she won't see me any more but completely opposite.  I thought I knew Chinese New people pretty well but it really was a eye opener to what the culture is about.

I'm going back to HK and give it a go. That's I can come back home when I want.
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sexysax
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Post at 2-12-2012 03:53  Profile P.M. 
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u serious? u gave up your wife for a girl u found in a bar?

not to be cynical, but you realize the older you get, the more woman will be attracted to you. and thats not a great thing cause the older you get the more woman are looking at your job and money. your wife loved you for who u were 10 years ago and thats not something u can find easily now that you're in your mid-30's or 40's i presume.

My wife has been caring only for our baby after her birth 7 months ago. she's not who she was b4 i married her. she claims she's tired all the time and wants to go to bed early in the weekends. it sucks for me cause i married someone who doesn't like to go out on dates anymore and wants to act like a granny in her early 30's. but guess what? I'm sticking to her cause if i get to know another chick, she's either going to be for my $$$ or the fact that she doesn't want to be single for the rest of her life. life sucks, but what you are doing, sir will suck even more once you find out more about your new girl.

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masteryama   5-12-2012 23:49  Acceptance  +1   Smart man!
DArtagnan   5-12-2012 13:29  Acceptance  +1   Wise words ... but tell us how you feel in 10 years if she's still nagging you!!
yazoo   3-12-2012 13:32  Acceptance  +3   Wise words
JckJr   2-12-2012 22:39  Acceptance  +1   can't agree more; be a suckee, not a sucker
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Buford
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Post at 2-12-2012 23:05  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #25 sexysax's post

Words of wisdom from sexysax.

If b-man wants to get out of a loveless marriage, well, there's a lot to be said for that, though the timing with the new child is really unfortunate. But the risk is that the new relationship is going to turn into another loveless marriage for the reasons that sexysax mentioned.
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Bluemeanie
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Post at 3-12-2012 01:27  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by b-man at 1-12-2012 16:34
Well I have an update.

First of all she is not a WG. Though we met in Neptune she is not. Admittedly I was there looking but she never asked for anything.

Anyway I told the wife last night and cam ...

In all fairness, if you are unhappy in your marriage and have really fallen for this girl, then give it a go. That there is a child on the way does complicate matters much more mind you, but you do not want to spend the rest of your life wondering what if. That you can go back home if it fails is a huge bonus.
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sexysax
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Post at 3-12-2012 02:59  Profile P.M. 
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I have to disagree. Just because you could fall back on your wife taking you back doesn't mean you should. once damage is done, its done. and leaving your wife now when she needs you most takes a lot of courage for her to brave it out. i was there for my wife b4 and after birth to let her know she was not alone.

anyways, good luck with the new chick!
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cactuss
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Post at 3-12-2012 11:24  Profile P.M. 
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convert to become a mormon and marry both problem solved.

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DArtagnan   5-12-2012 13:30  Acceptance  +1   Islam is also an alternative.
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yazoo
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Post at 3-12-2012 13:39  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Anyway I told the wife last night and came to agreement that 1 year to see if it's right. It was emotional after 10 years with the all the photos on the wall and I can say I'm a complete asshole but I'm not prepared to to live a loveless marriage that she was prepared to have.   I cannot believe what Chinese women will accept

I think she would probably accept you discretely getting what you need if she doesn't want the same anymore.

You can have your cake and eat it too.  Stability and love at home, a secure plan for the future,  excitement sex and romance on the road.  As long as you don't rub her nose in it, she'd likely be fine looking the other way.

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DArtagnan   5-12-2012 13:36  Acceptance  +1   concur. I know many couples where she doesn't want sex and allows him to play
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Bluemeanie
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Post at 4-12-2012 06:38  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by yazoo at 3-12-2012 13:39


I think she would probably accept you discretely getting what you need if she doesn't want the same anymore.

You can have your cake and eat it too.  Stability and love at home, a secure plan for th ...

I have a feeling this is how it is with my wife, not that we don't want the same things. I'm pretty sure she has an idea I was with someone (or many girls) while recently in HK. There were a few days where I didn't contact her at the usual times and next time I spoke to her she accused me of screwing around (she was right), but she hasn't even
tried to search my phone since I've been back which is surprising (the first time I went to HK she went through everything including bank records). Who knows, maybe she
just trusts me but she has commented that I've been acting a little odd since I've been back. Either way, I'm going to keep my head down and just hope she never sees any
evidence.
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b-man
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Post at 4-12-2012 07:55  Profile P.M. 
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Thanks for the comments both good and calling me nuts!

To let you know the baby is adopted and not finalised processing. It was more important to face up to these issues now than later when it was too late. I also wanted my own child as my wife cannot provide, though I was happy to have an adopted child it became so strong once the baby was with us that this is what I really wanted.

I also found out that her biggest love of 18 years ago wanted her to live with him and his family! His wife was happy with the arrangement. Leave me and go to Canada. She said it was impossible but she seriously thought about it. As he was a Chinese man he wanted to have everything.

Also my wife is Chinese and completely differentin thinking about love and devotion. Chinese are generally accepted to have love outside of marriage, accept that the husband provides for their future family. Being western I cannot accept and my girlfriend is not wanting to be a mistress.

Actually my wife and I have spoken the best we have had in the last 10 years. Speak all the underlying feelings and problems.

Anyway I have no idea if it will work out but I know I can't return.
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Bluemeanie
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Post at 5-12-2012 02:12  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by b-man at 4-12-2012 07:55
Thanks for the comments both good and calling me nuts!

To let you know the baby is adopted and not finalised processing. It was more important to face up to these issues now than later when it was t ...

If I was in your position (based on the info about your marriage) and I met the girl I started this thread about,  I wouldn't hesitate to leave. Any relationship will have it's
challenges regardless of the circumstances, however, if you both genuinely love each other you always have a chance. I wish you the very best .

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b-man   5-12-2012 19:48  Acceptance  +1   Thanks dude. Let's hope it will work.
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