Subject: BBFS mistake... I'm soooo stupid...
hulk2211
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Post at 9-5-2012 14:26  Profile P.M. 
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UPDATE

Thanks to all the bros who have passed encouraging information and thoughts.  Regardless of how accurate people are, it doesn't matter.  The fact that you guys are writing and trying to calm me down helps a lot.  I know the literature can be pretty conflicting at times so I've decided to just go through the testing and listen to my doctor.  I figure doctor's direct advice will always make me feel more confident than anything I read on the internet.  That's just me.

So last night, like the previous two nights, I went stalker and went to Wanchai to hunt down the girl I banged.  I struck out on Sunday and Monday but I finally found her yesterday at Neptune 2.  I spoke to her and told her I was concerned because we went bareback and asked if she would get tested with me.  She resisted because she said she had gotten tested before and she was clean and there was nothing to worry about.  I asked her some follow up questions about where she got tested and such and her responses were good so I believed her.  Specifically, I asked her where she was tested and she told me the address of the place, and I knew there was a clinic there.  I also asked how she was tested and it lined up with standard std testing procedures.

She didnt' want to go, and I of course was not going to be satisfied by taking her word, regardless of how believable.  So, I did what many people do in business when they face a problem, and I threw money at it.  I negotiated for her to come testing with me today for $2000hkd and she accepted.  We agreed to meet at 10am in Mongkok.

So 10am rolls around today and I'm sitting in Mongkok MTR and can't find her.  She texts me and says she's still getting ready.  I've been in thousands of situations where I've had to wait for women, but waiting for someone to come with you to take an HIV test is FUCKING TORTURE.  You're thinking "what if she doesn't show up?  is she scared?  does she have something to hide?  FUCK!"  Anyways, she finally showed up at 10:25am and we headed off to the clinic in Central that I went to yesterday.

I got the name wrong before.  It is called NeoHealth, and it is in the Li Dong building on Li Yuen Street East, close to exit C of the Central MTR station.  21st floor.

The technician from yesterday recognized me and gave me a brief smile as I walked in as he completely knew what the hell was going on.  He's a cool guy.

I decided to have her take the rapid HIV test.  I had considered having her take the Watson's home test but I'm being super cautious here and didn't want her to screw up the test.  Again, this is like 99% about my anxiety management.  I didn't want to leave the whole situation thinking the test might have been done wrong.  Also, the cost difference is negligible.  The Watson's home test is $200hkd.  Getting the rapid test at the center was $350hkd.  An extra $150hkd for the peace of mind of knowing that the test was done correctly is not even a question.  That's why I went back to the clinic.  Also, I guess I could have had her take the HIV PCR RNA test but then we would have had to come back in two days for the result and getting her to come back may have been cost prohibitive as well as a pain in the ass, so I just went with the rapid test.

She took the test and after 20 minutes of ball-shriveling waiting, she got a negative result.

The technician called me in as obviously he knew I was the reason she was here and allowed me to ask questions.  I'm relaying what he said for people's benefit.  Again, I am not giving any advice.  I am merely repeating what was told directly to me.  Take it for what you will.

The technician told me that the rapid HIV test indicates that she did not have an infection as of three months ago.  He said that there is a possibility that she could have contracted it within the last three months.  However, he said it was highly unlikely given the prevalence of HIV in Hong Kong of heterosexual and bisexual males, and how hard it is to transmit.  I told him thanks and that I would see him tomorrow for my own results.  When I get my results tomorrow, I will ask his advice on what follow up he recommends for me.  Will have to take it with a grain of salt, given that they make money off me every time they test me.  That may sound bad, but I know of doctors who intentionally overtest to make money so it's not like that never happens.  Obviously, it's not widespread but it happens.

Hunter - If you have any specific questions about the HIV PCR RNA test you want me to ask, let me know and I'll ask for you.  Or you can ask next time you go.

After the test, I spoke to the girl and asked her point blank if she had any unprotected sex within the last three months and she said no, only me.  I was looking straight at her and it did not appear she was lying but who knows.

I am obviously not out of the woods until I get my own results tomorrow but this was pretty good.  My current anxiety level is down from a 9 to like a 4.  It's a 4 because I've never gotten tested before and who knows what's gonna happen tomorrow when i get my own results.  Still, so long as it isn't HIV, then I'm not too concerned because I can just be treated and move on with life.  HIV is the one that's truly life-wrecking, and I'm looking ok at this point (knock on wood).

My total cost expenditure so far has been roughly $5000hkd.  It's starting to rack up but totally worth it for me given my anxiety.  If it happened again, I would honestly without hesitation pay another $5000hkd to avoid weeks of anxiety.  However, if you are looking for a cost effective way to get the same results, probably not the best idea to do what I'm doing here.  I'm totally disregarding costs.  I didn't even compare prices at clinics.  I just asked what their turnaround times were.

My next steps are to see my primary doc this afternoon and talk to him about the situation, and then get my results tomorrow.  Will report back tomorrow afternoon.

Again, thanks again for all the helpful posts.

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Dilmah   25-4-2013 17:41  Acceptance  +3   Great thing you tracked down the girl and took her for a test too.
TheButler   9-5-2012 23:52  Acceptance  +1   It's good to be thorough!
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dvdjef
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Post at 9-5-2012 16:28  Profile P.M. 
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Things are getting better for you mate, don't think too hard. And hold off the booze for next time
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hunter (Real Slim Slapper-Status: 九叔 .)
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Post at 9-5-2012 16:42  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #21 hulk2211's post

Interesting!!!
Never thought you will even search for that gal to go get tested with you....good job.

Anyway, as long as it helps you to reduce your anxiety.

It would be better tommorow after you get the result.....


It is ok, I can call and ask about them and ask about HIV PCR RNA.
Basically, I am still sceptical on its accuracy and perhaps you can ask the Doctor to justify that the test is conclusive though < 3 mths.

Thanks.




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TheButler
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Post at 9-5-2012 23:55  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #21 hulk2211's post

Great!  She came up negative!   Can I have her number??

o.k., in all seriousness, that was some real dedication you showed to getting this done.  I suspect that, with all the hassle for her, she might think twice before going BB next time.  On the other hand, she said she'd been tested before . . . that must indicate prior BB behavior, so maybe it's a habit for her.




I didn't do it.  Really I didn't.
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scootermonger
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Post at 10-5-2012 00:42  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #21 hulk2211's post

Hulk,

I know all too well your situation here.  If your anything like me, my best suggestion is to stop digging up shit about hiv on the internet, out of sight, out of mind.  There was a 3 month period roughly 4 years ago where I went crazy over a broken condom with a wg and didn't do fs with a wg until a month ago, just stuck to cbj's and hj's.  During that 3 months, I got every kind of test possible, just like you, rapid, regular, rna, etc, all came back negative starting from the very first test.  I was getting tested every week, switching hospitals weekly just so the staff won't think I'm crazy, I was even seeing a psychologist on a weekly basis for 3 months.  This whole ordeal cost me a good amount of dough, thankfully getting tested in China is relatively cheap, but the foreign psychologist was not.  Anxiety will create some crazy symptoms, I managed to get rashes on my arms, swollen lymphnodes/tonsils, don't let these things get to you, its probably just stress.

Anyways, best advice is to start believing the positive facts and leave it at that.  It's gonna be a rough 30 days, lots of crazy thoughts, do your best to get thru it.

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Frenchexpat   10-5-2012 13:51  Karma  +1   100% agree. Was starring at lb every time I peed. Of course, could see all kind ...
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Frenchexpat (Faites chier la vache)
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Post at 10-5-2012 13:49  Profile P.M. 
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Hulk,

If she is negative very likely (99.9%) uou are fine. I did the same, had the girl tested and the guy said "she's hiv negative, so are you, if she was negative but infected (like a few days before) , her viral load would be too small to be able to be transmitted to you, go home, forget about it". I did.

As he said to you, hk is quite safe, you are not banging a girl in a backstreet in bkk and she is a regular at Neptune. By the way, if her name is linked to something that grows on exotic trees and has milk in it (and no, that is not a cock tree) she was fine a few months ago as I had to get a test with her! ;)

Now, if hiv is negative its good, but you still need to get tested for the other STDs. Got two accidents of condoms, tested with the two girls (takes some balls to go to the doctor, people look at you...) one had Chlamydia (if I recall properly) and the other herpes, but got away with nothing... Now am stiking to hj... Was in Jkt a few days ago andman, this is really hard to apply...

Anyway, your good. Just let us know the final outcome bro!

Take care and wear a raincoat even on sunny days!
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hulk2211
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Post at 10-5-2012 13:59  Profile P.M. 
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LAST UPDATE

I called the test center today and they delivered my results over the phone.  I am clean on everything (HIV, Chlamydia, Herpes, etc).

I found it strange that they were telling me the results over the phone but afterwards it occurred to me that it was definitely a good thing because if there were positive results, I'm sure they would have said to come into the office to get them.

So, given that the girl tested negative and I tested negative, we are talking astronomical chances here of me having anything.  Anxiety level now down from a 4 to a 1.  I'm moving on.

As far as lessons learned from this whole experience, I did learn a lot.  I've listed them below.  These of course are based on my personal experience but may be of interest to others who may go through this so I figure it would be helpful.

Things I learned -

1) Numbers and statistics don't mean anything in terms of your anxiety level.  For those of you who have never done bareback or anything else that you may consider risky, it is absolutely pointless to try to reassure yourself after the fact by researching stats.  The reason is that it's really not about your chances at all, but rather the enormity of the downside that creates the anxiety.  Here's my example.

Let's compare two scenarios -

a)  You have a 1/2000 chance of getting stung by a bee
b)  You have a 1/2000 chance of getting HIV

If you consider case a, the 1/2000 chance is such that you won't give it a second thought.  Reason is both because the odds are very low, and the downside, while somewhat painful, isn't really too bad.  If you consider case b, the odds are FUCKING HORRIBLE, and it's not because it's likely at all.  It's because if you happen to get unlucky, then your life is screwed.  This is exarcerbated by whatever else in addition that you have to lose.  Outside of the fact that your life may be shortened, those of us with wives, kids, family, wealth, etc can have a lot at stake, and you WILL obsess about losing those things.

For me, 95% of my anxiety was focused on what I was going to lose, not about my chances of losing them.  Perhaps others have stronger will than me, but if you asked me before the episode whether or not I would freak out, I would have said "no, the chances are extremely small".  Now I know better.  Based on some of the other comments on this thread, I'm not alone.  I never, ever would have thought that I would have freaked out this badly over something like this.  If you wind up doing something stupid and don't obsess about it after, then more power to you.  Unfortunately, I wasn't one of those guys.

2) Looking at statistics and hearing stories from people were definitely comforting, but absolutely will not resolve your anxiety permanently.  As I was going through this, I would read something really favorable, and my anxiety was reduced for a while.  However, after a while of not thinking about it, it would hit me again like a brick and I'd freak out about it.  The only thing that made me feel better was stepping into a clinic and getting tested, as well as getting the girl to take the test.  After I did this, I knew that there was a definitive point in time where I knew either the anxiety would end, or I'd be in a world of hurt.  Since I was pretty stressed anyways, knowing the clock was ticking on getting a result didn't add to it.  It actually made me feel better.  So, if you are in the same situation, my take is that you'll never ever be able to resolve your anxiety by doing anything other than getting tested, because I tried everything I could think of, and nothing made it go away.  Just man up and go take it.

Hope my sad story helps someone else down the road.  Again, props to all the bros who helped me through this stressful time.
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hunter (Real Slim Slapper-Status: 九叔 .)
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Post at 10-5-2012 14:46  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #27 hulk2211's post

Yea man....good to hear the favourable news...

Oh, you can also ask Neo to send the result via email....

To all fellow bros,
Just Man up, yes; we reap what we sow.  Man up to your actions and consequences......

But be too brave and Man up to Bareback..........


I see doctors all the time. I am not shy showing my jupiter cock and sharing my story to them. Why?
Becuase I hate the anxiety, I want to talk to someone, share with him. So I turn to doctor, asking question, possibility, etc. Doctors offer great advice and info that you never came to know about, not even from  www. Internet.
No surprises to them, they make you feel comfy.
But it hurts your pocket.....

I hate going for test, knowing if the result is unfavourable. I go annual blood and urine check every year. Still hate the waiting time. I always choose the package with the most test for STD and the HIV test is a must.
I dont go bareback with WGs .....but I still get the anxiety......so I can imagine those who did accidental bareback or on purpose....

[ Last edited by  hunter at 10-5-2012 16:52 ]

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Frenchexpat   10-5-2012 15:30  Acceptance  +1   Agree! Need to know where to stop... Bareback is just playing with fire imho




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Intenseslacker
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Post at 10-5-2012 17:04  Profile P.M. 
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I like the sound of this clinic. Can you share the link with us? Would be nice to I have somewhere that would email the results.  I have been thinking of getting tested, but am never in HK long enough to wait for tHe results...

And good to hear things went well. Try to keep this in mind next time you are ordering drinks in wanchai. A drunk punter is an unhappy morning waiting to happen.

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hulk2211   10-5-2012 17:48  Acceptance  +1   Here you go... http://www.std-hiv-clinic.hk/
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investor
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Post at 11-5-2012 17:12  Profile P.M. 
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Excellent news OP, glad you've got the all-clear

QUOTE:
Originally posted by hulk2211 at 10-5-2012 13:59
LAST UPDATE

a)  You have a 1/2000 chance of getting stung by a bee
b)  You have a 1/2000 chance of getting HIV

I agree BUT... getting stung by a bee may increase to odds-on if you were to walk up to a hive and kick it while not wearing a special suit, wearing the suit would dramatically reduce those odds, staying away form a bee-hive altogether would minimize the risk even further and being in antarctica would give you odds of maybe one:five billion whereas beingin a warm climate would increase them.

So ultimately the odds of any risk are increased by our own choices. I once saw a sexual education video for condoms and, aside from being very very boring and lacking in sexy nurses, it summed things up perfectly. The safety of a condom may be 98% but this is influenced by putting it on. So in perfect conditions (i.e. you"re the right size, she's lubricated, its been put on perfectly and you stay erect throughout etc.) the safety is 98% but in anything other than these perfect conditions (or tolerances around) that % would decrease.

I agree 100% with the stress though - it's the real killer in these situations. It's the biggest downside to punting in general really.

[ Last edited by  investor at 11-5-2012 17:14 ]
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sirtiger (the banana)
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Post at 12-5-2012 02:09  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #27 hulk2211's post

sooooo now the big question is......will this change your outlook or your ways in regards to dealing with WG in the future?
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TheButler
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by sirtiger at 12-5-2012 02:09
sooooo now the big question is......will this change your outlook or your ways in regards to dealing with WG in the future?

The dude was drunk How many of us have resolved over the years to change our ways when inebriated only to find ourselves sloppy drunk and screwing a big 'ol nasty fat girl once again??




I didn't do it.  Really I didn't.
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wander
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Reply #32 TheButler's post

I can absolutely say, with 100% certainty on any nite you query, that I have NEVER screwed any ugly, fat chick.  Ever!  

It is only the next morning that such realizations occur.  

<wake>  <slowly, painfully, become aware of the fat chick beside you>
<<<who the fuck are you????  Shite!!!>>>>

Damn alcohol!  

Luckily, I've only ever had this moment a few times. (a fat chick once, a slim-big-tittied-but-still-but-ugly-girl-a-second-time.  So yeah..., it's happened.

They both called for a while after.  I had to move to a new continent.
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Chasem
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When I was younger I use to go to the clubs to pick girls up and one time picked up what I thought was a pretty hot chick.  

Went out and as soon as the light was on her, I realized she was one ugly mofo.  I seriously wanted to run like a bat out of hell away from her.  

So I started acting like a serious pervert and told her that I wanted to take her to a public park and do some serious x-rated stuff to her.  I also started bragging about myself in every way possible, including how many other women I've fucked.   

I just wanted to turn her off so bad that she would not want to stick around with me and this was the only way I knew how without actually making it too obvious I suppose.  I mean it was a gamble because if she liked me enough and was fucking freaky enough to go for it, I think I would have seriously just bolted faster than Usain Bolt himself lol.

But thank god she was normal, and got turned off really quickly and wanted to go away.  Whew on that one.  

Lesson, dark lights at clubs make gals look way better than they actually are.  
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TheButler
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Post at 13-5-2012 03:32  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #33 wander's post

Yep, 'Demon Rum!'  It makes us do irrational things.     Sooner or later you wake up in a strange hotel room all alone and you don't know how you got there.    To make matters worse, your asshole hurts like a mutha fucka and you don't know why.    I'm sure that's happened to all of us, no?




I didn't do it.  Really I didn't.
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Intenseslacker
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Post at 13-5-2012 07:17  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #33 wander's post

The question being, why did you give the fat ugly chicks your number. Or more to thepoint, why would you give them your REAL number?
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TheButler
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by Intenseslacker at 13-5-2012 07:17
The question being, why did you give the fat ugly chicks your number. Or more to thepoint, why would you give them your REAL number?

Um . . . because he was drunk?  I dunno . . . I'm just guessing here . . .

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wander   14-5-2012 22:28  Acceptance  +1   Good guess. hehe. Seemed like a good idea at the time (:>




I didn't do it.  Really I didn't.
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hulk2211
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Post at 14-5-2012 19:36  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #31 sirtiger's post

Good question.  I really don't know...

I can provide current status.

I went to Escape on Saturday with two friends.  I looked around and my friend pointed out this one particularly hot girl, but I wound up saying "It doesn't look good"  My one friend said "What do you mean?  It doesn't get to look any better than that!"  Then some other punter grabbed her.  My friend was like "Hey man, you could have had her" so I grabbed him by the collar and said "I'LL FIRE WHEN I'M GODDAMN GOOD AND READY!  YOU GOT THAT?"

Seriously, it was sort of scary.  I obviously haven't punted since the incident and I'm not sure if/when I'll get my mojo back.

I'm supposed to go to Macau next weekend and we always wind up in Rio Spa.  Hopefully that will be my "MiGs carry the Exocet antiship missile bearing down on my carrier" moment.  Otherwise, I may be seriously broken.  Will report back as things change.
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Post at 15-5-2012 17:47  Profile P.M. 
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Glad to hear the good news. Next time don't be as drunk when your with a WG. It's always tempting and your judgement is always stuffed when drunk.
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investor
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Post at 15-5-2012 19:42  Profile P.M. 
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QUOTE:
Originally posted by TheButler at 12-5-2012 02:48


The dude was drunk How many of us have resolved over the years to change our ways when inebriated only to find ourselves sloppy drunk and screwing a big 'ol nasty fat girl once again?? :l ...

Another university graduate then lol

Although there is the argument that sometimes the less attractive ones try harder? it's just remembering after getting drunk enough to find them attractive in the first place thats the challenge!
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