Would me nice if any of your bros are readers cuz I don't have anywhere to express myself. This is going to be long and boring but i am using it as a channel to release my anxiety/depression. I am going to write it as a story and segment it into different episode with each episode being my punting session.



Spoiler: all punts were street walkers, temple street. Not really spoiler but didn't want anyone to be disappointed.





My Punting Story.



Prologue:

I am 25 years old. Never had a girlfriend. Never had sex. I have followed This site since high school. I knew all the details. My classmates from high school went to have sex with prostitutes so I knew stuff like this was easy and possible.  I grew up with lots of depression from stuff and it's nothing related to girlfriend or sex. I was always the good boy in front of everyone's eyes. I actually was decent and had good friends around me as well . In fact, I had more female friends than male. They were easier to make friends with. Some look up to me and some I look up to them. I had moral values of my own as I do not follow religion and one of the strict value I told myself is to have sex only with girlfriend and if she allows it. If she doesn't wanna do it until marriage it's fine.

I had another rule. "If no girlfriend until 35, start punting like crazy". I didn't know my depression would be so bad recently that over took my ego for keeping strict moral for not having sex. However there was one dark side of me ever since high school that I never told anyone despite being very polite and honest to all people around me. I am extremely, extremely hyper sexual. I have been watching porn since god knows when. I am mostly into Japanese porn. I keep up with what's on new release on my favourite pornstars. Don't believe me? Let me just list out all the names for you bros who are into JAV (Asuka Kirara, Nishina Momoka, Haruki Sato, Rei Mizuna, satomi Suzuki, Mizuno Asahi (Tsubasa Honda- for uncensored), Tsukasa Aoi (fav), Riku Minato (fav),Tsubasa Amami, Sora Shina, Yuna Shina, Yuria Satomi, Yua Aida ( 2005,classic, retired), Jun Aizawa, Yua Mikami (she is fcking hot)... umm let's not get carried away but yes I was a porn freak. I even dwelled into 3D porn in my TV and also I have tested VR porn. Using google cardboard and phone. I recently (a week before my first ever punt) I bought fleshlight to control my urges. I masturbate like crazy. I once masturbated 7 times in a day and was able to do it 3 times in an hour once. I once had blood coming out mixed with a sperm. Went to doctor, got anti-biotics. They didn't test for Std as I told them I never had sex. Despite being that hyper sexual, I never thought of having actual sex. Well I did think but never actualise it (idk if I'm using the word actualise correctly) I was so sexually engrossed that I masturbate even reading some of you bros reviews. I was a lurker in the forum and this is my first post. I even masturbate on the pictures in this site.

Fucked up right? I think I may have become a sociopath.



Episode 1 - Virgin or not a virgin?

I knew about walk-ups and walk-ins. But never knew "street walkers" exists in HK. I work nearby so temple street was 20min walk. I decided to give a walk. I was surprised how hot some are. I have low standards and that's the advantage here, I am willing to bed with most girls I see.  I controlled myself and didn't dare ask "how much". I walked by Temple Street couple of days. Always going home and just masturbating thinking of those beautiful girls whom I can bed if I paid...easily. I have the money.

But one night, I saw this girl in temple street.  Left stall walkway. She was my type. As you bros say, MCOT. Good short height, Chinese girl. University student look. GLASSES. She wears glasses! Yeah one of my fetish. Must be from being very toxic with anime stuff. But gosh. I saw her 10 feet away. A foreigner old man asked her "how much" and she said "$500". I didn't keep money in my pocket to control myself. But shit, I ran to the nearest hang seng bank. I was shaking. I was telling myself "this is it, you are going to fuck her". As my hands were shaking while I took money from the bank $600 (I plan to give her $100 tip despite overly inflated foreigner price) I didn't care , I have money (yes I know I should have went walk-in then, but you can tell by my story where I am coming from) it was an  impulsive decision. I was like "pls don't go, I hope that old man didn't get her, how can he not? But maybe she is not his type, God i hope she is not gone"

While rushing back to the stall corner before making the turn...I told myself "listen, do you really want to do this?"

I am an honest person and if ever so I get married or have girlfriend and if they ask me if I had sex, I feel compelled to telling the truth...so this was one of the reason i controlled myself from having sex with prostitute. In my head I was like, "Fuck it, nobody loves you, despite being average looking, all girls just makes you their friends, you are useless, you won't get girlfriend, you won't get a wife, just go and get it done"

I screamed, "FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!" (...in my head)

"Hi! How much?"

She showed me five finger and said "$500"

I was like "okay"

She walks forward, I don't know how this shit works... I thought she was gonna go right back up but her place is somewhere further ahead.

Me: "oh this is happening , you have been watching porn for so long, you are actually gonna fuck that (looking at her butt). I always loved to watch doggy styles.

She goes up this building, I just look at her legs and butt while going upstairs. I didn't know how this shit works (street walker thing) but it's happening. I was soooo excited cuz she is those girls you see in mk walking past. She messages somebody. Maybe let's tai-lo know she has client...for her safety. We enter the room, there was 5 mini room. I believe each room has just a bed and toilet just like hers. She asks for money. I give her $600 on spot. They are having sex for money, not a easy job, the have their story back in their place, some are even moms of 2 kids to feed (I read you bro stories).

Me: "do you speak English"

Her: nods her head in confusion

She tries to take off her clothes. I stop her and ask for a hug and i try to have conversation. (I Am such a sad fucker). I get hugs from ppl but this is something I wanted, intimacy...being able to grab the breast and buttocks while hugging. (Okay I am sad and lonely inside)

Me: do you kiss? I point at my lips

Her: no, no kiss.

Me: *points at cheeks* how about here

Her: no no, (she points her entire lower body ) kiss here.

Me: okay, mo men tai. (She spoke mandarin, idk why I even spoke Cantonese)

She tells me to take off my clothes while she undo hers. I was hoping we both get in bed and we wildly take off each others clothes (intimacy is what I want but I didn't demand much, I am here to observe how things work around here)

I take off my clothes and sit on the edge of the bed naked like an idiot. But I also awed by the fact that there's a naked girl right in front of me. What a sight. She's flat chested. I have no discrimination on sizes. I don't like saggy so I don't prefer picking up bigger breasted ladies. Her push up bra made her look like she did have something. I like her how she is. Best part is, she keeps her glasses on.

She points me to go on the bed center. I am still not sure what I should be doing. I lay down like an idiot and oh! I went in with the intention of just having blowjob and cum out so that I can still keep my virginity. Yes I did still want to keep my virginity. Despite everything that's about to go down is really overwhelming.

She points and mouth, condom, my penis. Idk what she did but I figured she wanted to wrap me up for a blowjob. She sits on my left side while working her mouth on my penis. I was still in the stage of "this is unbelievable.."this is happening".."you saw this in porn and masturbated and now this is really happening"

I have hots for Asian looking women so I was going nuts in my head while poker facing the entire session. I explore her body , feeling her skin, her nipples, her breast, her thighs while she is working on blowjob. I was about to bust my load (and I should have as planned) but my instinct just took over. I told her to stop. I let her lie on the bed, I explored her body, kissing everywhere. I was on her neck going up she turned away and told me to only do stuff down. I said "toi bu chi" which means sorry. I am apologetic like that even I am the Customer and I paid a lot , I still respect her., anyways, to continue...I even went down to her vagina. I think I licked it a bit. Bad idea isn't it? Cuz they don't shower their customer and I don't think they shower, it's all pay-fuck-leave in temple street isn't it? I am already fearing STD for doing that. She was surprised I did that, that had me even scared.  I was gonna ask for bj to finish up but my instinct took over, I wanted to doggy. As she turned over I tried to put in my penis, I was still going in my head "don't do this!, keep your virginity , it's the only thing that makes you happy doing childish shit and make friends laugh and you like it too". I was struggling emotionally. I still tried to put it in... I don't think it even went in. I wasn't super hard because I was so damn conflicted and excited at the same time. She thought it was in, I thought it was in, she tried pumping and I tried pumping and I ejaculated. And I don't think my penis was in? I think I heard "gam fai?" Which means "so fast?"

I wonder if I heard wrong cuz she was using Mandarin at first. She took off my condom and cleaned me up with tissue and I wore my clothes and she wore hers. I told her thank you in Mandarin and asked for a hug. I am still a sad fucker who wished he had girlfriend whom I would give so much intimate attention.

I left the building. Oh and I never swallowed my saliva cuz I feared a lot . I took a large bottle of water from circle K and kept gurgling and spitting out on drainage on street. Went to near by McDonald toilet and peed and washed off my penis with the water bottle.

Entire way home I was even more sad. Because of how the ejaculation happened, I wondered if I had lost my virginity or not? Loosing wasn't important , I was in this void thinking where do I put myself. I did want to stay virgin, but am I still one? If I am then that's great. But then again I did have sex..kinda..not maybe. Virgin or not ?????????..the end. No more fucking. Just fck it. Get Std check and move on with life.





Episode 2- A lifestyle should not get used to


Boy was a such contradicting fucktard. Again I walked through Temple Street, this time I walked a head to Lai Chi Kok. Yes I walk a lot sometimes. Going through other streets to see if there are in street walkers. I thought portland street would have some. I was going sightseeing again and again through Temple Street and masturbating back home. I was totally wasted. I didn't know what I wanted. I wanted to go back and do them but I was scared of STD and a toxic-sex-filled lifestyle i might get into... I have good family, friends, money, social life... but I chose this. So after doing my long walk, took the MTR at Lai Chi Kok to go home but for some fcking reason I took the train to Yau Ma Tei and started heading Temple Street. I was going through my fight internally again. "Don't do this!"
And this fcking hot chick just came out of nowhere from the building after she served her client. She looked at me and I looked at her, we were walking same direction at temple street...I asked her how much. TIght Skirt, her busts were popoing out. Tall and slim. The fact that I read after 8pm you see more hotter younger girls has led me to go back to Temple street...and this was it. She was hot. She told me $250, i was surprised as hell. She didn't charge me 'foreigner tax'. We go up and she nods at this indian kid, I bet that teenager was her client before me, lucky. Oh this is the SAME exact room used for Episode 1 lady. This woman, so hot and cheeky, she is working on clients after clients, she seems to be so in a hurry to get me to cum. She takes my clothes  off, she takes her clothes off, leaves her bra. And gets me hard so fast and asks me to do her. While I do her, she moans so hard and hugs me. All missionary. While I pump her i told her to take off her bra which she did. Her moaning worked and made me cum fast. I think she gets her client, fuck for 10 min and done.(oh and I paid her $300 and also had the usual talk if she kisses then i asked for a hug...sad) Come to think of it, when I left I realised she wanted to sell me another session right after for $200.. I think. Maybe that's why she got me to cum fast I don't know. I did suck her nipple and kissed her neck so I had the same Episode 1 routine, Water bottle, spit out entire way home, mcdonald wash my penis and regret regret regret and feel sad. I am getting into the toxic life. A lifestyle I should not be used to.

Episode 3 - Really? Again?
I find myself in Temple Street again... I will skip my conflicting regretful thoughts. The same drill everytime. Overthink -> Impulsive Decision -> Regret later -> blame myself  and feel ashamed of having everything but still going this route. Now guys, don't get me wrong, I DO NOT look down upon any of you. We all have our lifestyle. It's just that, I didn't want to choose this one, atleast not this early.
So I saw this lady, probably a bit mature woman. She looked hot anyways. Eye contacted. I asked her how much. She said $500. She wasn't worth $500 but I said yes. She DEFINITELY didn't expect me to say yes. Probably wanted me to haggle to $300/$400. Once I said 'okay'. She looked down at my chest and up at my face. Like the look "wow, he go tmoney?". I don't really dress rich. I blend in like the other indians around the area. She looked nice, tight dress. Oh boy her floor though, Dark and so many floors up, i got so tired. I was like "wow" and laughing. This is much smaller room. I gave her I think $600. And I told her not to take of her clothes and let me hug her. She got the idea. She touches my penis while I hug her starting down at her clevage. I help her take off her top. Her breasts were nice but saggy once she took off her bra. I told her to give me kiss on my cheek. Ofcourse I had the same talk "do you kiss" "Do you speak english".. same old stuff. She hand jobs, Blow jobs, I go missionary but this time I wanted to try Doggy, like for real. Her butt was wide, not super attractive but better than seeing saggy breast missionary. So I pumped few times and I ejaculated. Paid, said thanks and left.. yes I hugged one last time after she put on clothes and left.


Episode 4 - Now this was great
Same old same old fcking story. Still find myself asking "how much?" there were 4 chicks standing together on the street intersecting temple street. I was just gonna sight see, but the second one had eye contact. I asked How much immediately. There was such an obvious pause. She should me four finger and put down immediately and smiled. I said yes and i followed her. Same old sad stuff. I ask if she kisses. Anyways cut to the chase. She is from Guangzhou or Guandong... i don't know, which ever speaks cantonese she's from there. Wait I think both places speaks cantonese. Now I can converse atleast something. All the past 3 episodes were no talk just business. She asked me what I do, how long I am in Hong Kong. I keep saying sorry I don't undestand much cantonese but I tried alot to communicate and we kinda understand eachother. Oh and I masturbated hours before I got her so that I could last longer. So she BJs me. All past BJ was from the side, this time I asked her to like go front, right in the center. It was nice trying to help her manage her hair. I was more awake this time as I have masturbated before hand. There's something about heightened sexual feeling, they narrow your vision (your sight), everything gets a little brighter. Must be the iris opening up. ANyways lets not get scientific. So my past punts were like that but this time i was more awake and i tried to take in the moment. This time tried something new, Cowgirl. She did it well. Long story short, the fact that I had a chat with her made the moment much much better. I wanted to try standing doggy and I couldn't get hard enough for that. My fear and regret was taking over again. I kept saying sorry and I asked for a blowjob again as I couldn't cum (which I am very happy cuz that was my intention), she took the condom and put in a new one for blowjob. I kept being apologetic. That's just my fcking personality. I don't have ego "I am paying you serve me" type attitude. I told her I will give her $100 more. And she was like "Gan ju?" like saying "what should i do for it". I told her I am taking time, I am sorry, Just take your time. She said thank you and didn't ask for it on the spot. She tried hard, and i got hard and pumped her so hard the whole bed started moving. She had eye contact on me and looks away and back again at me. It was all missionary. We had conversation, I asked her when she is leaving. She told me to find her again. Gave her the extra $100 as promised. She was about to go toilet and I wanted to go, i told her to go first but she told me to go first. I just love these small conversation. Anyways we are done, we both put on our clothes i hugged her and kissed herneck then her cleavage and said thank you in both mandarin and Cantonese.
I told myself. Lets stop it here, that was a great fuck and keep it in your memory...kept reminding myself "now this...was great"
Again, waterbottle, spit out, mcdonalds and wash my dick ending.

Episode 5- FUCK! not again.

Conflicting thoughts and then... boom..
Picked up a chick again, just like the one in Episode 3 but  a bit better. asked for $500, gave her $600. I don't even know why I tip them...told her to slow down. These women are rush rush rush all the time. She nicely kept my stuff in a place, she even hung my clothes. I don't know if this is her get go or she is trying to make up for asking high price and my tip. She went to toilet to wash her self and I thought she was doing standard walk-up stuff. So I pointed to ask if she wants me to come in. That was so naive. She pointed at the bed and asked me to stay there. So what she did was warm herself up so her vagina would feel warm. Again, I was surprised. she did this cat bath thing on bed, she was so dry it kinda hurt but i didn't say anything. I was just surprised. She had saggy boobs. I went missionary and I asked her if I could kiss her on her cheek and she said yes. So while I missionary, I kissed her and I ejaculated. The kissing was new experience.
Paid, left, regret. Hate myself. I kept saying "FUCK! NOT AGAIN?!"

Episide 6 - Close the loop
I saw the same chick I saw back at episode 1. She was just lurking around like a normal person but still keeping an eye on punters. we met eye contact but I passed her. But after few scouting I went to her and asked her how much she said $500. I told myself. This time, actually fuck her. And be done. Close the loop. It's the universe telling you... you had enough. The universe gave you the same chick you were confused if you fucked her or not.. just fuck her and you are done close the loop. I don't know why that was in my head "Close the loop". She was a dead fish, did missionary, then ended in doggy. And this point i don't even want to explain. I am sad, depressed, ashamed of myself and running out of forum word count. After I am done, I told myself "The loop was closed, it's done, you wanted to doggy this chick and you did, go home, end everything for fucks sake"


Episode .... Please let it be final.
God, just 10 days later, I punted again...Thai Chic, speaks english, paid double + tip $600.
She pointed her self and said "tip" so I gave her 100 but 10 min later I realized her name was TIP. Fuck i don't even want to bother with this story...or anything cuz I am so low right now
I could say a lot on this punt. I mean I got rejected by a chinese chick noding her head few min before hand. Probably some south-east asian assholes weren't nice to her. I felt bad both for her and a bit me. Now I felt like I had to fuck so I got the thai chic and told her I will fuck twice. Okay I'm explaining the story now.. my writing just got worse and worse. I wanted this whole story to be like a novel but now it's all a mess. I will keep it very short, she was surprised i asked to fuck twice, other customers only fuck onces and done. She was tight, she's a dancer back in thailand. Her english was okay, we communicated. I asked her how much she gives to her boss and stuff. She told me ppl haggle with her for $150 and she points them to other cheap mamasan place. She says $150 is too little. I told her there are many price range, and showed her the system of Walk-Ins and this website. (Not sure if i should be even doing all these, asking how much she pays her boss and showing her this site). I don't know, I was always fascinated by the network and how things run. After I have done her once, she really asked me if I wanted second time, cuz i struggled first time  a bit. I still said yes. Gosh I don't want to get into details on how struggling it was, it was a turn off when she got frustrated. If things were done nicely and right way, I would have gotten horny already. And the worst part is, other thai girls were screaming and my girl went out to check out what happened and she screamed as well. Great view of her ass tho. She came back, I knew exactly what happened. One of the girls got a really hot client. That just destroyed me completely... I couldn't feel much better myself.
THe rest, all i did was hump her nice butt and hump her in the front. I was nice memory for me but i was hoping to get errected enough to have sex but I did get errected but when I put it in, and looking at her annoyed face, it just turned me off. She was nice at first but got fustrated when I wanted the 2nd time and wasted her time.
Anyways, I said nevermind. We put on clothes, I said sorry, Hugged her good bye.

Ps. When i did my usual "do you kiss". She told me "No, for... your protection, better not kiss". That just got me so scared. Yup, that was the beginning of the session. Also she was so damn surprised when I asked for blowjob, i don't think she ever did BJ to any of her clients. She did me (All my BJ were covered for all girls). But for the entire session. like the whole session she keeps spitting to the bucket. I asked her why. She said she doesn't want to swallow. She is quite conscious.

My worry is, after I did missionary I masturbate. I don't know how bad it is to get her juice from the condom to my hand.
I don' know anymore. I am just done. I think I will just wait 14 days. Get STD Check and be done with it and get on with life. I have good paying job, I am in a field where I can grow to be better but if I get into this worryful sex craze, I think I might end up killing myself. I feel like telling my story to one of my close friend who happens to be Religious and Female...She's a close friend but also I feel like she will judge, the world will judge. And if by chance If I do get a wife or girlfriend what do I tell them if they ask "Have you ever had sex?" And STD check is also something is getting me worried. I don't know what I have done. I wish I didn't do what I did.

I will end here. Enjoy Punting.

PS. My evil thoughts keep coming and telling me to try Walk-Ins... maybe that's something I should look forward to when I am 35 and single. For now I really have to grow in the thing I am doing. I just graduated and got a good paying job... =(
I don' t know why I grew up overly sensitive.

Here are a few thoughts.

I don't think you are a sociopath. I think you are a sensitive guy that has a great deal of respect and guilt in your life.

You can get an STD in a number of different ways. I've done this for well over 20 years and get bare blow jobs all the time. So far, no STDs at all. Some say luck, I say it is the pool is swim in that keeps things clean. But really, no guarantees for anyone.

It does seem you are seeking intimacy more than just sex. But, once you get sex, it is a mother fucker to stop getting it.

You aren't sad because you want to hug a girl, it is your desire for intimacy. That's not sad, it's totally normal. Most of us are the messed up fuckers.

In my mind you are a victim of the judgement society places on meaningless things. Sex is a natural act that every human is predisposed to seek out. Society, mostly religion, has made sex outside of the marital construct a bad thing. It isn't. It is one of our most basic drives. Enjoy it.

If the guilt is why you want to stop, don't. It is a false emotion. No one is getting hurt and you are not a bad person because you like sex. You're normal!

As far as telling a future wife/girlfriend about your sexually experiences, sure, just start by asking her, you first. I doubt she will be too open with her experiences either. But just tell them that yes, you had a few Gfs that you were intimate with in your life. Then ask if they want to see pictures.

Enjoy your life, don't overthink things, do what makes you happy, don't hurt others. Repeat until happy.

J

Your account reads like a Fassbinder film: full of melancholy, despair and sharp observations. I am touched by your honesty and sincerity, and I am sure all the bros on this forum agree with me. You are a cultural, intelligent, and sensitive young man, and I wish you all the best.

Just a few points. First, I agree with Jake Houston that the joy of sex is hardwired in our DNA. To deny it is to fight against billions of years of evolution: you have zero chance. No belief system is able to suppress this successfully, and the attempts of doing so have caused countless sufferings in history. Accept the pleasure of body as a fact of life, and use this urge to direct your life in a positive way.

Two, Temple street is pretty hardcore. It's an equivalent to going to street hawkers for chicken feet and pig intestines before you even have a chance of developing a fine palate. You are tempted to eat street food, but ending up with disgust and angst afterwards. Hong Kong offers a variety of chooses. Enjoy a good gourmet experience first, before you venture into hardcore stuff!

I agree with Bro Mister that Kama Spa, my favourite haunt, is the place for you. In fact, it is designed for novices with such a laser precision that I like to call it the gateway drug for punting. It's in a high end location, very unexposed, and the girls there are very friendly, generally enjoying being kissed. No negotiation is required, as everything is clearly explained on their menu. The only minus point is that they do not offer FS. But I do not think FS is what you need. You need intimacy followed by a release, and Kama is top notch for that.

One attraction of Temple Street is that you can convince yourself you are just walking there to have a look and you can always walk away. I think this is true for all guilt pleasures. But even in a massage joint you can always ask for a veggie massage if you don't feel like doing more.

It may sound surprising to you: I have never paid for sex in my life. Like you, I am very peculiar about this, and I do not want to have sex with a woman I don't love. Even at Kama, where I go regularly, I almost never asked for a HJ (would this disclosure leads to my disqualification by this forum I don't know). It is the closeness to another human being, and the sensual pleasure of being touched, that I long for. The point is, our cravings are unique and it is important to follow your heart.

I look forward to reading more of your reports, hopefully on more enjoyable encounters. Use your considerable talents to inform and enrich us. This forum is generous and safe community.

[ Last edited by  zebra at 1-9-2017 11:48 ]

I was waiting for zebra's reply, and he did not disappoint me. Ponder his advice. If you read his reports (Search is your friend), you will see that he is a kindred soul, the embodiment of a gentleman punter, and I use the last word loosely, so that he doesn't risk being kicked off the forum.

Speaking of the forum, one thing that keeps me intensely loyal to it is that, unlike many such venues, where a macho mentality that revels in the "you got her to do what? that's nothing, I forced her to do this, and made her nod her head to show she enjoyed doing it, too" prevails, its members, if their reports are to be believed, by and large treat working girls with respect and appreciation for the service they provide. You will find many members who started out much like you, but experience and maturity have brought them to a place where they indulge in this "hobby" at relative peace with themselves.

Here are some random thoughts on where you find yourself and where you might go next.

1. As an occasional user of porn (the obsessive binges have become less frequent; in my time, Sora Aoi was the idol of idols, and Rio was pretty good, too) I'd suggest weaning yourself off the hardcore Japanese stuff, because it's essentially a horror show put on to cater to men in a specific culture with specific hangups and provides a fantastical image of women that's untethered to reality. If you must indulge, try some good-quality amateur porn (maybe with Chinese girls, why not?) featuring unsimulated sex, or even real female masturbation (how do you know it's real? the girls don't look like Barbie dolls) for a glimpse at how women get turned on.

2. Streetwalkers (I've been there, though not on Temple Street) are an easy way for young men to fall into a vice habit: they're visible yet anonymous, and cheap. They're also a trap -- the cold, hard, deep end of the pool, best left to fetishists seeking out the excitement of a "hurry up, next!" encounter in an environment that is unhygienic and dismal. You've chronicled enough experiences of this sort to last you a good, long while, possibly a lifetime. Your problem is you're looking for love, or lust, in the wrong places.

3. HK is a wide-open market for pay-for-play, with several segments to suit punters with disparate desires. A quick glance at reports in the various sections will attest to that. Let's, however, cut to the chase; there'll be plenty of time to explore walkups, walk-ins, etc., once you've found your feet. As a diffident noobie, your best bet is to dip your toe into the shallow end of the novice pool. However, even the "spa" segment, for that is what I'm talking about, is diverse, and even if you stand a better chance of finding the intimacy you clearly seek and desperately desire here, there is no certainty you will find it. The closest thing to a sure thing is Kama.

4. Kama Spa (Search is your friend) sees more non-Chinese than most rival establishments; it would be fair to say "foreigners" are an important target clientele, and they've seen all kinds, from businessmen in three-piece suits to drunken louts from Lan Kwai Fong (whom I presume they screen at the buzzer). Dress as if for a date (the girls are often seen in fetching long gowns) and go well-groomed. Politely explain to the girl who greets you that you're new at this and that you'd like a kind, Cantonese-speaking girl who would be comfortable with you and with you kissing her, at least on her cheek and her body. She may giggle, but you can be sure that's hardly the most outlandish request she's heard that week. Speak English but throw in some of the Cantonese you have. It will break the ice and make the girls instantly more comfortable. Try to maintain an air of quiet confidence and be gentle in your initial, tentative contact. Read the body language in her responses to your advances. Keep it smooth and slow until she clearly signals she wants more. Be ready to back off if she indicates discomfort. Feel free to chat. Kama girls, if trained by Joy, know that their role, like that of the best courtesans of old, rises beyond the physical to the spiritual. Tea, sympathy and a laying on of hands. Ask zebra.

How to avoid punting taking over your life at the start?

I know you have the wherewithal, but you also have admirable self-discipline.

At the beginning, give yourself a strict rule: I will do this at most once a month.

Don't break it. Time your adventure for the end of a particularly stressful week, as a sort of reward.

Make an exception for your birthday, and only then.

Trust me, the anticipation and research in preparation for the punt will keep you off the streets until it's time.

Do this for a year. After that, find your own rhythm. By then, you will know you have the discipline it takes to keep the hobby in its proper place in your life.

Thanks for writing your story.

I'm sure this resonates with a lot of men.

I have only started punting late in life and wish I would have started earlier.  I'm married and love my wife a lot.  After many years of marriage things can get pretty stale.  That being said, I still love my wife a lot.  I went to Thailand a couple of years back and started getting massages and that lead to me wanting happy endings.  After getting some then I moved to BJ's.  I felt very free as this transition took place.  I almost thought I was close to death prior to this new life of punting.  The sex urge is a strong urge for some people and to deny it isn't healthy in my opinion.  

My advice is to follow your own moral compass but really look and see "why" you would have certain feelings don't just operate on what you think "society thinks".  Society is full of false morality.  I really feel WG's provide a very nice service to society.  Anyways....  I enjoyed your writing and honesty.  Keep up the good work.

Destrike, Thank you very much for sharing your story.

While not everyone gets a depression diagnosis in their lives, we've all gone thru depressive phases in our lives. Some of these phases can be short, and others can linger and be something that we deal with for months, years, and for some, a lifetime. It's important that we have a support system in our lives that help us to keep ourselves balanced. What makes your situation a little more difficult to discuss with people, is that you're turning to sex as your crutch as opposed to substance and/or gambling. Not that these are any better or worse, just that it's easier to talk about than sex. In most societies, sex is still a taboo topic that people don't discuss openly enough about.

I don't think that you're at a point where you've got an addiction, but it does sound like, substance abuse.

Here's what I mean. When you're abusing a substance, there's a need to satisfy that craving, but you don't feel good about it after. It's also similar to people who become bulimic. You feel depressed, feel an urge to satisfy that craving, but once you satisfy that craving, you feel bad about it. Most of us, eat and drink for merriment. But abuse would be someone who seeks it out to satisfy a craving and then feels bad about it. And I hope that I'm wrong, but it does sound like this is how you're using sex at the moment. And I'm saying this because you said, your own words, "Overthink -> Impulsive Decision -> Regret later -> blame myself  and feel ashamed of having everything but still going this route".

I'm not saying these things to condemn you. I'm not saying these things to judge you. But I'd like for you to reflect on it, because if it is true, I think you need to talk to a professional. You're young. You don't want things to spiral out of hand.

In the meantime, I agree with the other guys that have left messages for you. Try some HJ spas that offer some level of intimacy. The other thing that I would suggest you trying, is also something like Seeking Arrangement. Stay away from the ACT of having sex for the moment as your PURPOSE. Yes, it's paid, but just enjoy their company, make out like crazy, and IFFFF sex is a natural progression to your rendezvous, so be it. But just go and enjoy the company of a cute / hot chica for a bit.

You're not a sociopath. A sociopath would have no guilt. No remorse. You're currently full of guilt / remorse. Hence, you're not a sociopath.

Sex is a beautiful, natural part of our lives and our DNA. And everyone on this site participates in mongering for different reasons. Some people are just horny as all f*cking hell and just want to f*ck. Others want to explore their sexuality. And still others want to experience new pussy. There are some who are here because there is intimacy lacking in their lives and participate in this hobby to satisfy that. There are also many
I'm not here to judge / or condemn anybody's motives. But I do hope that engagement in this hobby is something that is healthy, something that is happy and enjoyable, and something that enriches people's lives as opposed to become a crutch that's could turn into an unhealthy addiction / problem.

I'm sure it wasn't easy for you to tell anyone about your thoughts / feelings / experiences, and I think I can speak for the people who have responded at least, that I'm glad you did. I hope that there is someone you can talk to about this, and if not, I hope you continue to talk to us on this forum. I hope also that everyone on here continues to keep this forum a safe place for all of us to share things that might otherwise be difficult to discuss on other forums and in real life.

~UD

I am sure the experience is familiar with many of us, whether we never had a girlfriend, in a relationship, married or divorced.

From my own experience I've been punting almost 18 years now. It has been a steep learning curve as I had been scammed with some girls and had some really forgettable experience at the beginning, but as you grow older both your LB and your mind puts you on a straight and narrow with more focus. What I mean is that a lot of the initial punts starts with wanting a total GFE or a PSE like you see in the AVs. Most of the time after the session you will feel empty emotionally as reality sets back in. That's how I felt during the first few years.

Then I had a long term girlfriend who eventually became my wife now, although we try many things in bed but sometimes the LB wants to try something different. Initially I made a mistake of falling for a couple of the WGs and got emotionally attached to them, but that was a bad move as most of them are after money rather than finding a relationship of any sort. So after that I had to learn to balance between home life and my punting life. With my work I spent a lot of time on the road around the world as I have done close to 2 million miles and 500 round trips to god knows how many countries over the past 18 years. So over the past few years I have learnt to have fun on the road and when punting outside now I sometimes seek something simple like a rub and tub with some GFE thrown in, sometimes a really dirty PSE BBBJ with CIM or COF, and sometimes an all night session at a hotel so I can just do whatever I feel which is a mixture of GFE and PSE.

But at the end of the day what I have learnt to control is never let your punting life affect what you do with your home life or work life. Luckily my parents are quite open minded and knows what I and my brother get up to sometimes, but they always say "whatever you do outside, don't let the feelings affect what you do at home". And nowadays I choose my girls very carefully as some of them I see regularly but don't have any emotions attached to them (there are a few that I keep contact with depending on what kind of mood and experience I am seeking, and they treat me like a regular customer like you go to eat at your favourite restaurants, which means sometimes they make the effort to give you the PSE or GFE you want in order to keep coming back for more). You have to remember they are not exclusive with you and they will work through hundreds if not thousands of punters during their respective careers. So just enjoy the moment and when a gem appears sometimes have fun with her. Cos life is too short and you only live once!

As a middle-aged married bloke who has an affinity (but not an addiction to) to porn (especially JAV), I would like to say that you will learn that going to WGs is never going to be like the sex and services you see on Japanese porn videos.  And it's possible that all that masturbating at such an early age will ruin your plumbing at a later age, i.e., you might find it increasingly difficult to get aroused and excited, and believe me, you really don't want that (despite the little pills available).
But, like other commenters, there is nothing wrong about sex for the sake of sex and pleasure, without all the romantic entanglements.  Don't fall for a WG.  Go out and have a good time.  No need to feel guilty.  I'm married and I punt on occasion, and I don't feel guilty or bad afterwards, since my now-religious spouse is not giving me any anymore...

@ Destrike, read and take all the advice that the bros are sharing with you.  You are a courageous young man reaching out and sharing your situation.  Even if this is an anonymous forum this shows you are brave, self aware and intelligent.  There is absolutely nothing wrong with you and guilt is a mysterious dark force we all (unless you are a sociopath which you are not) battle with every now and again.  

As UncleDad mentioned, there is nothing wrong with going and talking to a professional and this does NOT mean that there is anything wrong with you!!!- sometimes (well mostly), it is better to talk to someone (who is a professional and CANNOT tell anyone what you talk about) you don't know who is completely objective about your situation.

You have actually made the 1st step in reaching out on this forum and keep doing that - you will see that there is no judgement here (unless you shag grannies like Obe).  Without speaking for others, maybe you could PM a bro who's advice particularly hit a spot with you and I'm sure they would respond 1-2-1

Stay strong and be safe.

@ all the bros that spent the time reading Destrike's sharings, saw a young man in pain at a confusing stage of his life an then took the time to give detailed advice............this is why this is a fucking great forum and the 1st one (on any topic) I have ever contributed to.

Keep up the good work.

Au

[ Last edited by  aurufc at 9-9-2017 16:53 ]

I am always prepared to fill any holes that a bro forgets ;^D !!

As Jake.houston put it most of us here are messed up fuckers, still the comments, advice and concern as a on this thread shows that as a community we are not bad fuckers!

My 2 cents: we are not built to be monogamous, leave alone to have a single sexual partner for a life time, neither has monogamy been the societal norm in most cultures for long. Certainly not in India till the last century, especially in the more well off sections of the society. The societal norm or moral compass that you felt constrained by is quite recent and artificial in nature.  

As far as STDs go, there is always a risk, but it isn't too different from an adventure spot or even horse riding for that matter. You can choose a small pony or an old mare if you are risk averse or a stallion at it's best if you are feeling more adventurous, just don't forget the protective helmet whatever you choose. If you are worried about the frequency, just think of a kid with a new toy, the obsession is going to fade as he gets used to the toy.

If you ask me, you have no reason to feel guilty. I second uncle dad - seeking arrangement or maid parade might be more to your liking.. as long as you don't end up falling for them.

Stay happy. Stay safe. Stay connected.

@Destrike, you have a lot of emotions and feelings going on, and most of the comments have addressed a bunch of them.  There is a ton of excellent advice and reflection in the follow up comments.

#1) I agree you are nowhere near a sociopath.
#2) I also agree the hardcore JAV stuff might be a bad route.  If you need the porn, go for the softer stuff or the amateur stuff or the loving making sessions. (In fact for me, I usually watch watch some Movie simulated sex scenes from hollywood/TV and a combination of the less hard core porn). JAV is not real sex, it's weird shit, and not just YOU, but there are a ton of young adults out there that have a fucked up vision of what sex is, and they are seriously unfulfilled trying to live up to incorrect expectations.

We don't watch horror films and then try to live up to that level of crazy in our lives!?!  We know it's fake and stupid, it's just for entertainment.  Somewhere in porn we lost that same understanding that it's fake entertainment.

#3) Agree Kama is the way to go as a safe environment.  Safe physically, and mentally, and emotionally.  The girls are kind, not jarring jaded girls.  You have self confidence issues dealing with the ladies (LIKE SO MANY OF US FOR MANY YEARS OF OUR LIVES), and don't subject yourself to attitudes of the crazies walking the street.

No offense to the ladies walking along Temple Street, but there is a risk you are getting the lowest of the low, the real crazies, the almost junkie types, the ladies with daddy issues who are scarred for life, and financially looking for their next meal. A lot of these women are jaded with some serious problems and yourself already feeling sad and with some anxieties are walking into some serious landmines. I mean your diving straight into the dumpster, that is risky and unhealthy not just from an STD perspective, but from your emotional and mental well being.

Also, FYI I have some wife/GF friends and they have admitted they don't care so much when their SO's get a happy ending.  As long as it doesn't become a bad habit, or that their man is not falling for the therapist.  **NOTE not all, I said SOME!**

#4) Agreed you are a kind, sensitive person, and sex is a normal urge, so there's nothing really wrong with you.  As others stated you are desperately craving sex and intimacy. THAT IS VERY NORMAL.

OK, I'll talk a little bit about myself too.

Every dog has his day
So I was a nerdy skinny dorky kid who grew up thinking no girl will ever like me, and I'm a loser with zero confidence, and how will I ever get laid?  It's going to be impossible right???

Well I had heard the phrase every dog has his day, or that every guy eventually finds his girl.  Not necessarily the girl of his life, but a girl that thinks he's attractive, even the nerdy geeky awkward kid.

IT IS TRUE!!!  No joke man, every guy eventually finds a girl who thinks he's attractive, and believe it or not, as you get older there are MORE THAN ONE!!  Ya, more than one female out there in the universe will encounter you, think you are cute, like you, and want to sleep with you.  It actually is real.  I couldn't believe it myself, life teaches you things.  It took me forever, but I'm finally fairly content with myself, my looks, with who I am.  I still have my days where I'm back to a geeky feeling awkward doubtful kid, but for the most part I finally feel decent with myself. (I'm 40+ it took a long damn time!)

So ya man, be patient, eventually it's going to happen, you will find a woman or women that like you for who you are and you won't be paying them for sex.

Society and it's restrictions are kind of fucked up

Society puts these restrictions on us, especially in conservative families where sex before marriage is banned.  You don't want to go against your religion, you don't want to against your culture, you don't want to disappoint your family, you don't want to sabotage a future relationship.

OK there is a lot going on there.  I respect all religions and cultures.  I get the conservatism.  Family units were introduced into the early days of human existence and monogamy came about anthropologists believe, because in those early days when a woman had a baby she couldn't have sex while was caring for an infant.  So annoyed males killed the babies, so they could put the woman back to functional and start having sex with her again.  SO....a father instinct kicked in at some point, and if he wanted his infant to survive he had to stick around and protect his child and woman to keep other man away.  Thus monogamy and family unit was born.   And even that may not have been life long, just enough to give the infant a chance which does happen in other parts of nature.  

Yet fast forward and we have this thing called marriage, which is pretty damn hard.  One woman to rely on is tough, and a lot of us guys are on this forum because that rule just doesn't completely work.  

My rant is getting really long and losing my point, so I'm cutting myself off and saying: it is INSANELY COMMON for guys to have had sex BEFORE MARRIAGE and AFTER!  Now of course I am NOT going to encourage you to cheat on your future SO.  But I am saying you haven't done anything horrible, EVEN IN THE MOST CONSERVATIVE FAMILY, if you had sex before marriage and even if it was with a WG.  

I can tell you personally, I know a couple of guys who are indian and had arranged marriage and had been with WG's before marriage and it didn't destroy their future relationship with their bride.  Now, when is the appropriate time to have that conversation with your possible wife?  I have no idea, it's definitely not the first thing you talk about.  I don't know if Indian guys in HK do arranged marriages, but even if not, when you do get into a relationship, eventually there will come a time where you talk about each other's past.  You need to be able to bring it up, and open yourself up to her.  And it's your past, she should be able to accept you if she really cares about you.

Again, I have seen it and I've never heard a girl saying, "We dated for 8 months, and he was an awesome guy, but he eventually admitted he lost his virginity to a whore on temple street so I had to dump him for his previous crimes against humanity."  That doesn't happen.  (Again of course you dont first meet a girl and say, "Hi it's our 3rd date I really like you but just wanna say I had sex with 6 prostitutes before I met you").  There is a timing for everything.

Be Careful about being desperate
I've seen this cautionary tale too much.  I've seen guys from all ethnic backgrounds who have low self esteem and think they'll never find a girl, and ONE girl finally gives them some attention and some intimacy, and they girls are SHARKS!  Piranhas!  They are terrible women who turn these guys into their manslaves.  Always bitchy and complaining and not a true 50/50 relationship, just a woman who found a guy with no confidence and treat him like crap.

There are various forms of this:

#1) Low self esteem guy living alone in HK hires domestic helper.  DH is clever figures this guy out, makes a move, gets intimate, becomes his dream girl.  They get married within 6 months, he opens a joint checking out, 1 month later he wakes up and she is gone and his checking account is empty.  (I've heard this happens more than once).
#2) Low self esteem guy goes to a wanchai bar, picks up a girl who shows him love like he's never know, similar story, similar few months later checking account is empty, along with a dude with a broken heart, who feels lower than before.  (insert wan chai bar for other WG situations).
#3) Guy meets a girl, it's his first GF and she likes that he bends over backwards for her, and she's a bitch but he puts up with it coz he doesn't know better and SHE lives happier ever after, and 20 years later he's a miserable sack of shit.  (seen this a bunch).

I'm not trying to rant about evil woman, but if you are really dying for intimacy you can easily be duped.  AND I AM A LITTLE WORRIED YOU COULD GET DUPED AND HURT.

The WG desperate woman who's in a fairly POOR financial situation, sees a guy with low confidence and decent amount of cash could be a real sucker!  Those ladies see $$$$$$$$

Or I've seen just a guy who marries the first girl he dated, thought he couldn't do any better, but never thought if the girl CARES ABOUT HIM.

So just a word of caution, because I'm a bit older so I've seen it, and I empathize with guys struggling with their self-esteem because I've been there!!!  I got lucky I avoided those ladies, but I've seen my share of them in HK.

Overall the advice on this thread is fantastic, and we all crave sex, we all crave intimacy, we want to make our parents and loved ones happy, and most of us want to treat all women with kindness.  And many of us had trouble with the ladies and low self esteem or still battle it to this day.  These are all normal things.  But you are jumping into some unnecessarily dangerous waters, so please use some caution.  Also please know, there are girls out there ready to share intimacy with you, be patient, you haven't met them yet.

[ Last edited by  mchk at 14-9-2017 17:31 ]

Slightly off topic though

Or as my Asian mate's Asian wife phrases it "We are in Asia, girls and sex are easy to come by but we only have a problem if you STOP paying for it....." ;-)

To confirm mchk's point, this is not all women and I'm not sure if a Western SO would have the same opinion.

One of my friends back in Europe did a full disclosure after proposing to his wife using the line of "I was in the army so it was the only way to fulfil the physical need"  She accepted it though never forgot it and was always suspicious.  Naturally he kept on punting on business trips and after getting busted twice because she as she was always suspicious would check receipts, monitor withdrawals etc and they split multiple times over it.  I think it is an individual decision on full disclosure  though does carry risks in a relationship.

Another note of caution is when you punt with your mates who the SO knows.  Another mate of a mate got busted by his wife after a boys weekend away, did a full historical disclosure without mentioning his mates and the 1st thing she did was call all the other wives with the "well if he has been doing it, yours must be as well." Luckily this wife didn't know me or mine so I escaped but it caused hell among them.