yazoo
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Post at 18-7-2011 02:33  Profile P.M. 
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The Ladder Theory

I found a link on another board for http://www.laddertheory.com/

It gave me a couple of laughs while thinking "so true, so true".  

From its FAQ:
Q. Is this just satire?
A. Nothing is just satire.

[ Last edited by  yazoo at 17-7-2011 10:34 ]
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bedlam
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Post at 18-7-2011 13:13  Profile P.M. 
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Ladder Theory has been around for a long time.  Harry from "When Harry met Sally" had it right.

It's a pretty fun topic to discuss once you've broken the ice.




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onidragon
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Post at 21-7-2011 13:09  Profile P.M. 
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LOL I just finished reading ladder theory... funny stuff! but eerily true on some counts. All my female co-workers have always been on that ladder... I distinctly remember thinking "I'd like to fuck her" when I meet a girl... or "I'd fuck her if I was dead drunk"... LOL I gotta ask my wife about HER ladder! see if I'm high on it!
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dellfish
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Post at 22-7-2011 12:18  Profile P.M. 
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Thanks for posting this link.  I have had many relationships in my life, including three marriages, multiple girl friends, and countless p4p or one night stand experiences.  From this perspective, I see much truth in ladder theory.  However, I also see that it has two important flaws.  All through the presentation, there is ingrained the idea that men and women but especially men are essentially monogamous.  All men are looking for the perfect woman to fuck and all women are looking for the perfect man for a "relationship".  The second flaw is that it ignores what happens after a couple fuck for the first time.  

First Flaw.  

I urge you to read Christopher Ryan's book "Sex at Dawn".  Ryan postulates that men and women are equally polyamorous by nature, that is that they both want more than one sex partner more or less simultaneously.  If Ryan is right, and I believe he is, most of the objections to ladder theory that are presented at the end of the discussion fall into place.  Men and women both have multiple ladders.  

This would work as follows:

I live in Guangzhou.  I go once a year to Los Angeles for a few months.  I go once a year to Beijing for a couple of months.  In GZ, I have a ladder with three women on it.  In Beijing, there are two women. In LA, there are five.  As soon as I move to a new geographic site, I call the girl at the top of  the ladder there.

This does not have to be confined to different geographic sites but can also can be a matter of convenience or preference.  Jane certainly wants a rich man to fuck on the top of ladder 1 but wants the sexy and virile biker on the top of ladder 2.  She fucks both simultaneously.  She marries the rich guy but continues to fuck bikers and firemen.

Second Flaw.

What happens if Jane dates Jack who is at the top of her rich man ladder for a month and then goes to bed with him and finds that he wants to be peed or beaten up.  Jane is disgusted and turned off.   Jack, rich though he may be, goes to the abyss.

Or what happens if Henry dates Mary for a few months and finally gets her into the sack to find out that she is disgusted by oral sex and will only fuck missionary position and never gets turned on or comes.  Henry may throw her into the abyss as well.

On the other hand if Harry and July fuck and have great sex with 12 orgasms each, they will be at the top of each others ladders for a long time.  

Ladder theory needs some revisions.




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yazoo
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Post at 22-7-2011 13:24  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #4 dellfish's post

I think the author would say...
RE your first flaw
Men put everyone on a single ladder, but will fuck the person closest to the top that is immediately available to them.  I may have Tina Yuzuki at the top of my ladder, but unfortunately she is not immediately available so I will choose the next person down.  

For the second flaw
Men are placed on her ladder based upon attraction, which includes a whole pie chart of things.  As soon as sex has finished, the whole pie chart adjusts as novelty is reduced and other information becomes known.

I would say that novelty scores pretty high on the man's ladder as well.  Faced with re-fucking a Tina for the third time, or Sora for the first time, I would pick Sora.
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dellfish
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Post at 22-7-2011 18:22  Profile P.M. 
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Reply #5 yazoo's post

Perhaps you would fuck Sora over Tina since you already had Tina twice and Sora is new.  But how about if Tina brought Sora and five sorority friends home and you could orgy with all of them at once?  Or suppose you were the emperor of Song Dynasty China and you had thousands of concubines.  How would that all fit on a single ladder?  

Likewise, suppose Mary wants to keep her rich banker husband and to keep him means she has to fuck him once per week but she also wants the big dick on her soldier boyfriend since it feels much better than the banker's small limp organ?  And once in a while she wants to fuck her professor at school because he is fun and will give her a good grade?  And then there is the banker's best friend who, with his wife, do swap parties with them once a month at the country club?

Some women have sex only a few times in a lifetime and some want it a few times a day.  The latter kind will most likely not be satisfied with only one man and will have different reasons for wanting their various boyfriends. Some bfs will be for money, some for long hard sex; some because of their skill in cunnilingus, etc.   All on different ladders (Sunday ladder for banker, Tuesday for soldier, Thursday ladder for prof, etc)  and all to be replaced when the bfs leave or when the hi libido woman tires of them.  "And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson, / Jesus loves you more than you will know. "

Also it is not just novelty that attracts people to a new lover but similar  sexual interests.   I have a lot of trouble with a woman who just lies down, spreads her legs and shows no feeling at all.  I love a woman who convulses in spasms of orgasm during sex.  If I have the first kind, I might keep her as a gf just because she provides other kinds of companionship but I sure as hell will look for a highly sexed girl as well, especially one who loves the taste of semen.

You have to stretch the ladder theory to explain polyamory.  So I still think it needs revisions.




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