# Three nuns went to a football game and three men got stuck sitting behind them. The men couldn't see very well because of the nun's little nun hats. So they came up with a plan to make them leave.
"I think I'll move to California, there's only 50 Catholics there," said the first man.
"I think I'll move to Washington, there's only 25 Catholics there."
"I think I'll move to Idaho, there's only 10 Catholics there." Then one of the nuns turned around.
"Go to Hell, there are NO Catholics there."
# Q: why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
A: cause she blows the horn!!!!!
# What do you say to a blonde that won't give
in?
"Have another beer."
# Q: Why don't blondes use vibrators?
A. They chip their teeth.
# Two lawyers are walking down the street, when a beautiful woman walks by.
"Boy, I'd like to screw her," says one lawyer.
"I agree," says the other.
"But out of what?"
# Why did God invent shopping carts?
To teach women how to walk on their hind legs.
# Did you hear about the guy who found out the secret to making women happy?
No, neither did I.
# Q: what is a blonde's only complaint about oral sex?
A: the lousy view.
# Q: what's the difference between a pit bull and a blonde with PMS?
A: lipstick.
# A man was walking down the street when he noticed his grandpa sitting on the porch, in the rocking chair, with nothing on from the waist down. "Grandpa, what are you doing?" he exclaimed.
The old man looked off in the distance and did not answer him. "Grandpa, what are you doing sitting out here with nothing on below the waist?" he asked again.
The old man slyly looked at him and said, "Well, last week I sat out here with no shirt on, and I got a stiff neck.  This was your Grandma's idea!"