I have been seeing a girl from work, as I am Marry and live in a very small town. We can't just go get a room since everyone knows everybody. We have been doing it in her car near my house. So last night we park at our spot and was just do some forplay, she saw the cops drove by on the street. As we were park along side of a building we couldn't see the cops. Next time I know he was in front of us and drove beside us. She opens her widow to talk to them in French since I live in Quebec and a don't speck French at all.after they spoke for a few sec the. Ops drove away, I ask her what's going on, she sauce there was a case of thief there last week and she told them we were just talking. We wait a min and we try to find a new spot with no luck she drop me near my house. She is much younger and knows I am marry, just hope the wife don't catch me

Are you paying this girl?

No and that's why is not a report, hope I did break any rules

Would love more general info on quebec (party spots, WGs, etc) if you have the time!

I live in a small town that has no WG, lots of good fishing and hunting here

The wife some now found out that I was cheating, now I have to move out. Not good

She track all my history on my cell phone, after someone told her that I was seeing her. I denial every at first. More people was telling the samething so she cell my cell history online, the didn't believe anything I said after she saw the time and amount of text we were we find each other.

It sounds like a tough spot raptor. Sorry to hear about your troubles. What do you think your plan of action is going forward? Getting wifey back and apologizing like crazy or let it ride out see what she does, or just let this be an opportunity to re-enter the single life? May be a bit early to say?

Sorry to hear bro, you should use chat apps like wechat or whatsapp  similar so there is no history online for her to check. It is just untraceable to the average person.

Trying to get the wife back, is tough since a have 2 young kids. Is not worth it at all now that I got caught, the kids hates me too. I will try to have the family back together

Hey Bro Raptor,  How are you doing? Any updates one your situation?  Hope you're making some headway. I've had personal turmoil before, nothing on your scale, each day felt like a warzone was running in the background. Wishing you lots of luck getting her and your kids back.

She told the kids? They should be kept out of it for now. Tough luck.

Geez!  How many people knew what you were doing??

Shocker, shows the value of a second phone, small investment compared to the alternative.

Tough on you. It's going to be hard for the wife to accept. Things would not be the same anymore. There is no use crying over spilled milk, what's done cannot be undone. No one should live to be constantly judged for his mistakes. If opportunity arises, have a calm talk with her and ask her if she could ever begin to forgive you. It may be measured in years but not decades. If she says 'No', then move on. It is pointless and certainly unacceptable being punished for such a mistake for years. It might be better to take the consequences and rebuild your life. Your situation isn't the first and won't be the last for men all around. There is a life after such a mistake. As for the kids, sure, they'll hate you for now. Hope for maturity to set in and they might understand later when they grow up.

Let me add ... there is value in you trying to establish communication, for the impact on the kids ... whether you're married or cohabiting or separated, kids' development is impacted by the relationship between the parents.  By kids' development I mean emotional resilience, intellectual achievement, IQ, and other measures ...

Sorry bro, that's probably not at all what you want to hear right now.  But I'd be negligent in my duty of care as a friend if I didn't share what I've learned.  

The good news is that sexual infidelity (perhaps surprisingly) is NOT one of the proven causes of divorce, not even close.  That means there is a chance to work things out.  I'm not even saying you necessarily need to avoid divorce, if that's right for you.  If "healthy relationship between parents" means you live separate lives, that is likely to be better than any arrangement that has you living together or apart and sharing anger / blame / criticism / defensiveness.  You have some alternative choices to navigate ...

Of course the bad news corollary is that if cheating is not a predictor of divorce, why is there an issue between you?  And clearly there is one ... which means that divorcing won't solve the problem, just bury it.  Resolving it would require you both to face difficult questions, and to support each other to resolve the tensions that are getting in the way.  

How to do it?  Beyond me, except to suggest that a) at this time most professionals seem to be saying the victim of infidelity needs to set the timetable for recovery, and b) joint counselling is the recommended best practice.  

If you're interested there are a lot of materials you can draw on.  One warning: a lot of the books out there are based on no better than the subjective opinions of a well-meaning individual who wrote about his beliefs.  That can be very encouraging stuff to read ... but ... you also have to know that the failure rate in counselling is horrific, with around 65% of interventions failing and half of the successful cases relapsing in the long term.  And that's for the intervention techniques that have been formally tested ... the majority of intervention approaches have no scientific rigor behind them whatsoever.  

Again some good news: Recently (in the past couple of decades) there has been some real evidence-based science published, which has debunked a lot of myths about marriages and what causes them to break up.  That means if you get the best information you can do more things that work and avoid wasted effort on trying things that actually don't work or(in some cases) even make things worse.  Very good news if you're serious about results.  If you've read this far and get what I'm saying, look for John Gottman online, buy his books, and start studying.  You have nothing to lose, and potentially a lot of good to gain, either for your kids, for your family, or at least for a future relationship you can build.  You might even be able to avoid being the rather uncomfortable statistic that second marriages fail about 50% faster than first marriages do ...  

lots of unsolicited advice there - take it or leave it as you like

This is from my experience with friends getting caught red handed.  Normally, the trick is to deny deny deny, well it's obvious you've already admitted to it.

If you stay, you'll hear this shit for the rest of your life but you'll have a family.  

If you go, you'll be free but after a while you'll feel loneliness eventually, especially since you have 2 little ones that you'll miss dearly.

You're choice bro.  Good luck.

Let this be a cautionary tale.  Whenever surfing use incognito mode when surfing the web.  
Can place certain pics and vids on secure vault apps.  Would recommend secondary passwords if that sensitive.
For Wechat and Whatsapp texts use disposable / temp G-mail address and REMEMBER TO REVERT back to your regular one.
Delete texts.  

Good luck on getting back together.

There's one saying:If you are afraid of being caught, you should not have done it in the first place.
Food outside looks nice, taste delicious, solve our short cravings. Food inside the house warm our stomach and fill the place we cant fill ourselves.
Bro, i wish you all the best fixing this, it will take time, but if you thing it's worth while, dont give up!

Some times its best just to moved on.  Your wife will never turst you again and your children will always think you do bad things and hurt mommy.  Sure your staying around might keep the family together, in the sense that you will all be living in under the same roof, but the basic structure of the family has been destroyed by your actions.  Let this be a good lesson for the future.  And if I sound a bit harsh, its just while I was a child growing up my family went through certain events that sound similar.