Hey this is mostly to the Chinese 141ers, but simply how do you deal with the constant why aren't you married yet type questioning off your parents? I don't live with my dad he tends to spend much of his time pissing about in Asia. Yet he regularly phones me and constantly attempts to 'introduce friend, who completely by coincidence happens to be female and unmarried and also single'

My dad has these conservative values that you must be married by the time you are in your late 20s, I've hit my 30s already and the phone calls (and inevitable arguements about getting married) are becoming increasingly common.

Before you you guys say fuck'em and dump 'em these women are shockingly ugly. And or psychopathic (which is why THEY are nearly 30 and unmarried)

So how do you guys deal with this sort of family issue?


Note Olde' Kennich NEVER intends to marry, the old I like milk doesn't mean I have to buy the whole cow type thing, maybe my attitude will change in the future but I doubt it.


Thanks

Best strategy for dealing with colleagues and friends is to tell them you had your heart broken when you were younger and you just couldn't put yourself through that again. This is particularly useful when dealing with fuckable woman, as they'll think you are sensitive. Honesty definitely worst approach with these people.

For family members there are several strategies that can be employed.

1. Use a bad family divorce (most families have at least one) as an example of what can go wrong and what your trying to avoid.

2. Tell them you've gotten engaged, introduce them to a middle aged WG and let them spend the next 12 months talking you out of it.

Good strategy for job interviews is to wear a gold ring and tick the married box on the application form. If down the track they find out your single, tell them you were engaged/married and recently broke up/divorced and were so devastated that you couldn't bring yourself to take off the ring.

Does being married increase your chance of being hired?    Wouldn't they want a young single guy that will not have family responsibility so he can work into the wee hours of the night?

Actually quite the opposite, employers like married guys because they think they're more settled and dependable and with the wife, mortgage and 2.4 kids, they can't afford to knock back any overtime. Also misery loves company.

Single guys need the weekend to party and chase pussy. They can walk away from a job with a crappy boss and conditions because they have less responsibilities.

my friend, to get your dad off your case just say your Gay and he will never let u get marry

Won't work, plenty of gay guys are married with kids.

On top of that the information would end up circulating amongst the family gossip, may even get out to work colleagues and friends.

[ Last edited by  atomic3d at 7-12-2010 12:53 ]

Well it looks you will have to do something along the lines of the old Ang Lee movie, 'The Wedding Banquet'.  Call yours the 'The Engagement Banquet'.  

Like the gay guy who had to get a fake gf to marry in order to placate his parents, you do something similar but get a fake gf to get engaged to, not marry.  Hopefully you can draw out the engagement for a few years which will keep your dad happy until you break off the engagement to repeat again with another girl.  By time you break off the 2nd girl, you will be in 40s and your dad will have to resign himself to accepting that you rather be single and happy than to be unhappily married to a psycho girl.  

i hate to tell you this, but your dad and other relatives will badger you to get married and will continue to mention those words 'when are u going to get married?' until the day they die.  So having a gf on hand is the best way to deflect the question until the next phone call.

Clever strategy. Maybe you can hire one of the nicer-looking
WGs to be your temporary GF as an escort to the next CNY
gathering. Trouble is it has to be the same one every year
for this to work, and you have to agree on a background story.

Why would you need to have the same girl every year? You break up with her after CNY and spend the rest of the year too heartbroken to even consider any other girls, then get a new one when the story wears a bit thin and go through the process again. Also mix and match with the middle age WG scenario as per post#2

Have you ever met any of these girls your dad / relative wants to introduce you to ?
you might be surprised some of them might be real lookers !
a friend of mine's younger bro met a REAL beauty through an intro ... might be to your advantage
to meet a few of these intros just to satisfy your family ... and no one's pointing a gun at you to
go to a church after your meet up !

I agree here. I have met quite a few lookers through the family and their friends but don't usually date them cause I don't want to stuff them around.

I think it depends whether you're a new age decent looking guy or not.  I'm getting close to 40, unmarried, have a nice steady flow of girlfriends but can't seem to step up to the marriage plate.

At this age, we're like diamond with a good job, good status, good life ... many girls would consider. My parents have stopped asking because

a. They realise i'm not gay, so nothing to worry about
b. They don't think im ugly so being single seems to be a choice
c. They realise that I'm quite difficult and complex - so smart girls don't put up with my shit
d. They realise it's better for me not to make a mistake for the sake of getting married.

Now days, married or not, they give me the story of how they love seeing their friends play with their grandkids and wish they could be as happy and  simply ask me to have a kid so they can play with them hahaha

If they do ask why I don't get married, I just tell dad he didn't leave me a big enough inheritance to support a family

maybe tell the truth... you'd like to get married but you're having way too much fun banging WGs!

I never had this problem with my dad because he remembers what happened when he rushed to get married.

"Take your time, son" is pretty much all he has to say to me on the matter

Not just parents, my friends asked me all the time why such an eligible guy like me is still single. I just kept saying I don't enjoy this relationship shit but in fact I am having the time of my life doing all these beautiful big breasted WGs!

TAW's advise might actually be the best solution for dealing with the father, the simplest solution is often thebest.

Just be careful you don't find yourself sucked in by any of the civvie girls. You could find yourself taken to the cleaners in family court 10 years down the track.

I would have to disagree here.
I've had bosses who prefer single guys who can work longer hours without complaining.
One ex-boss even asked me in the interview whether i was married or not.
Eventhough it was an illegal question, i answered it anyway since I was single and wind up getting the job.

I suppose there might be some industries were it's an advantage being single particularly low level starting positions.

Overwhelmingly though it's been my experience that the guys doing the hiring are married and like people from the same club.

Like I said in a previous post misery loves company, if they have to put up with the ball and chain why should you get off enduring the same prison term.

I dated a lot of Asian civvie gals (usually Vietnamese) in the late '90s and the last g/f was Korean. In my experience with the VN girls, if she's still on the market at 25, something is wrong with her and/or the family.

Still, give your old man props for looking out for you. And you know what, you may meet one and you might find you like her more than you thought you would.

I'm still single.  My parents have given me some incentives to get marry.  They will pay for the wedding and give me some money to start with her.  My uncles, aunts and sister said they are planning to give me a large sum of money as a gift too.  I am also getting pressure from relatives and a few friends. They are telling me to see this girl and that girl who is a friend or cousin.

When I do get marry, I believe my mongering days are numbered.  It will be extremely hard to leave the USA without her.  In the USA, the quality girls are just too damn expensive.  I can't travel around the world without my wife. Well, I could get a job that does requires you to travel.  I have met a few guys who are married, that travel on business.

Or take your dad out punting with you and then when he brings up your singleness, tell him to shut it or you tell that he had a WG.