I've spent the last two years searching for my wife's killer.
Nobody will do it
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl on the toilet?
Because the p is silent.
I just met the bloke who invented zero. "Thanks for nothing!" I told him.
My boss pulled up at work in a brand new BMW and I couldn't help admiring it. He told me if I work hard and put in the hours he could have an even better one next year.
I've gone through my phone contacts and deleted all of my German friends. Now it's totally Hans-free.
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