You like de kelp forest, mon?
Yessss mon! Jus' cuz I and I got de badazz longest dreadlock on da island don' mean I don' like a fine Rasta gurl what trim dem pussah hair!
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Lemme splain what I mean cuz I is a rude bwah, you hear a rude bwah talkin' here. But like me mon Jackson say in dat Babylon movin' picture: “I eat de pussah/I eat de azzhol/I eat ever' muthahfukkin' thang.” An' them fine Kingston pussah-packin' wimmin they growl like da Lion of Judah, rev like a motorbike, purr like a kitten, and when dey cum dey rise up like a panther and slam down like a TONNA BRICK!
My rude bwah fren' Da Bat say you from SweeDEN, I dunno this place, he says it cold, I say like ice chest fulla Babylon canna BEER?
I don't drink dat stuff no, I and I and my little herbstalk, heh heh heh. He say you no Babylon and you like da pussah-hairs like da kelp forest off da California coast, I seen it once on da bloodclot teevee station, Discovery Channel, I discover dem big plants wavin' in da water and things swimming in there.
You like the forest, OK mon. I and I would get lost in there mon. I looking for da pearl, not da kelp. An' I hate when da pussah-hair gets stuck in mah teef. Got to get da bumbaclot dental FLOSS to get that thing outta there. Rasta gurl got some strong pussah-hair mon.
But get da clippers and it ain't no PLUCKED CHICKEN, what u talkin' mon. If you go to da Babylon store and buy da razor then maybe...an' after two days it grows stubble and itch, some gurl try it once she go back to de clippers nex' time, sure.
Every Rasta know this, even them that work a Babylon job and wear da bumbaclot suit an' tie and don' pass de chillum, even those crazy dum-dums know da clippers create da nice sof' bush an' help a mon find da pearl. You want to swim through da long KELP, OK mon. Maybe if it get long enough she can make de pussah-dreadlocks.
Got to go, Jedediah just pull out a massive spliff, FTW, mon.
Erastus Righteous Obeah-Dude
666 Ganja Lane
Kingston Town, Jamaica mon, where u t'ink?
[ Last edited by JackTheBat at 13-6-2012 15:30 ] | |
