Womanisers v players
I love the last bit she had a good guy, but moved on because they were "incompatible" and of course it was nobody's fault. Then she has the hide to bitch that the guys she does the dirty with are all bad boys. "Were have all the good guys gone?", they wised up to bitchy princesses like you and joined the bad boy club
Womanisers v players: Are all the nice guys taken?
July 7, 2010 - 7:32PM
When it comes to men, I'm a little confused. Not by the fact they can't seem to put the toilet seat down (no matter how many times you tell them), prefer sport over sex (especially during World Cup season), ask for directions, have multiple orgasms or talk about their feelings.
Instead, I'm talking about something far more complex, sinister, hard to pinpoint and something that's been plaguing me ever since I started to dip my toes into the icy water that is known as the modern dating scene.
So here's my dilemma: how the heck do you tell whether the man you've just met is a womaniser, a player, or just a nice guy who is clueless when it comes to dating?
Because here's the thing: you meet a man and suddenly there's an insatiable chemistry. Sparks are flying, jokes are shared, common interests are identified. He's charming, sexy, complimentary and you're exhilarated to think you may have actually found "the one" (or at least a bloke that doesn't make you cringe over his table manners).
He says all the right things (tells you he's taking you to Cabo for your honeymoon, invites you away for the weekend and tells you he's picked out your kids' names already - true story). And you believe him. After all, he makes you feel like the luckiest person in the world just to be around him. Eureka.
And then everything goes south. Where did the phone calls go? Where are the romantic dates? Where are the compliments? What went wrong?
There are no answers (especially not coming from him) so you begin to blame yourself. Was it something I said? Did I come on too strong? Was there some spinach between my teeth? Have I put on weight since he met me!?
After your self-esteem sinks to a new low and you've drunk-dialled him one too many times for any shred of self-respect to remain, it suddenly all makes sense: he's just a player! A womaniser! A man who is stringing along another five unsuspecting women all at once and you're just a poor pawn in his playboy game!
So why didn't anyone tell you before you fell for him? Did those around you simply revel in the fact that you're about to be burned, chewed up, spat out and left to start the whole sordid process all over again?
If you're anything like me, and wish you'd been a little smarter before you swapped spit, here's a little checklist to help you out. Don't say I didn't warn you …
The womaniser:
He...
• Tells women what they want to hear regardless of what he actually means.
• Promises you the world (despite the fact he may not have a dime to his name).
• Loves wining and dinning women.
• Needs women around to boost his ego even if he's not interested in them.
• Doesn't necessarily go in for the kill right away so as to make women think he's really the nice guy.
• Needs to be constantly reminded that he is loved and admired by women.
• Is sleazy
The player:
He...
• Loves the game and the strategy around picking up women.
• Pushes for sex quickly (but pretends to be nonchalant about it).
• Takes all the women he dates to the same restaurant.
• Tells you what you want to hear.
• Will be dating and juggling many women at once.
• Has no real and genuine desire to share a future with you.
• Will call a few times a week but be inconsistent.
• Will see you on Saturday and another girl on Sunday.
• Will reel you in by making you feel good about yourself and show you a fun time but will then pull back, which keeps you asking questions as to why it all doesn't add up.
• Seems genuine when you are together but is distant when you're apart.
• Doesn't man up at the end of the day.
• Uses women, tends to be a cheater and only tends to show his true colours once you're hooked ... because that's his aim!
I know one man who isn't a player or a womaniser: my ex-boyfriend. He never had any other female friends, no wall posts from random women on his Facebook wall, no hang-up phone-calls from pissed-off ex-girlfriends and never tried to make me jealous - not once.
Sure, we might have been incompatible at times and, yes, all break-ups happen for a reason. But when you're constantly faced with a barrage of blokes who hide their true intentions in favour of a quick score, one can't help but wonder if all the nice guys really are taken …
Link here:
http://www.smh.com.au/lifestyle/ ... /20100707-zzwf.html | |
