Happy141,
I often have this conversation with one of my best and closest friends. He moved to HK around 6 years ago to help with his family business, and he ended up going to lots of KTV. It is just the nature of Chinese business. He's had girlfriends during those years, but he doesn't seem that happy. I really worry about him. On the other hand, I'm in the states, married, have a kid, a prestigious job, etc. We both complain. He complains about being lonely, living in HK (small space, crowded, materialistic), empty life full of KTV girls. I complain about being in the rat race, living an "Office Space" existence and my wife spending all my cash (oh yeah, and she can spend cash-- she's already eyeing my bonus).
His bro told me he's definitely changed. He used to be the nicest and coolest guy I knew. He was super laid back. Now he has a much shorter fuse, and well, sometimes I can sense he even gets pissed off at me. Apparently, I'm the last guy he gets pissed off at (according to his bro and his KTV buddies), but I can tell his personality has changed. He seems happier now because he's stopped wanting to come home and accepted his surroundings. (more on this later)
On my side, I have everything a person would ever want, but I still bitch. I found myself going to KTV with my buddy, and coming back to the U.S., and being completely disoriented in how I interacted with my world. I thought about KTV all the time. I started making jokes to my wife about how I was going to run off with a KTV girl. I would get pissed if my wife didn't "treat" me properly. In fact, I think I just got used to having a DJ get me everything. he he!
Anyway, long story short-- going to KTV, mongering, etc. does distort your world view (it is hard to see how it can't). Also, no one his truly happy. That is the part of the human condition. If you were happy all the time, you wouldn't get out of bed. It is one of three noble truths of buddhism that "life is suffering". The other two is "Suffering is caused by want/desire" and "when you stop wanting, you will stop suffering". It sounds sucky, but I've been happier lately. how? I just accepted it. I think my buddy is the same, and cheers to him! 
I'm a corporate grunt, but I will never be hungry, my family will always be taken care of and I should just enjoy every moment I have with them. I try to be happy with what I have, and realize that in this "Great Recession," it could be much worse. If I ever become "super baller rich" then "Sweet!", but I don't long for it any more.
In other words, the grass is always greener, and nothing is perfect. Just accept it, embrace it and happy mongering! Only then can you reach enlightenment (and you'll be the buddha of mongering)!
pb | |
