before I go any further with her, ie say marriage, the living situation will be that we will be living together first for several months and know her before taking the plunge. That I have already thought of. my friend once told me that even though you've known her for 2.5 years, you are thouisands of miles away and see her once every so often, it doesnt compare to being with her and knowing her for one month. To that I have to say yes, that is true. I would need to be together with her to really know what she is like on a daily basis. Living together day in and day out will test each others character and know whether we can live together. I am not saying i am gonna jump in and marry the girl, but I also cannot say that just because she's thousnads of miles away and an ex-WG, there is 0% chance of something further.

No girl on the planet is ever worth it.  Confucious says pretty girl causes lots of pain, or something like that.  Never fall for their pretty looks, because quite frankly you can buy much better.  

but the problem is she isn't even that beautiful, I mean not super model gorgeous but definitely not ugly. There are millions of chinese girls that look like her or look better but for whatever reason Im attracted to her. so looks is not the main concern here

i would not do  it...sometimes girls are pressured by parents or other relatives to bring their "boyfriend" home...unless you really like the girl, don't waste your money to go dude..

i never said a WG is a bad person who doesnt deserve love...
im sure most WG doesnt like their profsession either, and some of them are forced into this business, or has simply no choice.

i just would never do it.. have better options than taht

THAT is very wise!

That old saw about absence makes the heart grow fonder etc ... is very true/correct.

I go and see a few regulars in China - and everytime I see one of them - it's great!! Never a dull  moment!!

Now.... compare that with the experience of most guys who's married/lving together with their ONE!

Yes it WAS great and exciting when one is courting etc.  Move in together or get married - how long before this feeling of being constricted start? Why HER problems becomes so much more important than yours??  Or even the only thing that matters? Or why.... you get my drift.

Yes, go ahead and live with her for a while - and then come back here and let's discuss it all again.

After you get left wondering who that phone call, when she was all friendly, was from, when she's on the rag - and also refuse to blow you - when she embarrasses you in front of your friends slurping her soup and spitting her bones on the table - when you really wonder if hygiene/manners/normalcy/even common sense ARE that much different from what you thought was a given.

Just IMHO

SEAJ

I'd say give it your best shot. You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain. A few years back I finished a contract in another Asian country and was offerred another elsewhere. I accepted and even had the flight booked. At the last minute I decided I might love my GF that I'd met while I was there [not a WG, but that doesn't matter]. Anyway, I stayed on for a few months and it didn't work out but at least I could leave with no regrets. Nothing in life is worse than wondering what might have been.

exactly my thoughts. I dont want to have any regrets in life either. That is my number one worry that I will grow old someday and look back on my life and think about all the things that i didn't do but that I could have given a shot to see where it went. Doesnt' mattter if it's being with a girl, starting a business, moving halfworld to work, whatever the reason, I feel like life is short so just do it and see where it leads. If it doesnt work our for whatever reason, what have you really lost, some time and money but at least you gave it your all and found out that it wasn't gonna work. Failure is an option I can accept but failure to try is an option I will not accept

That statement is deep and I commend you for it.

Live life without regrets - I hope that is the corrollary.

SEAJ

thank you!!! I was just writing and it just came up, popped up in my head adn I wrote it down

reasons come first, answers come second! this also applies to other things you do in your life. good luck. but do spend some time in china with her to see how well you settle!

definitely before I move forward, it's gotta be at least 2 to 3 months living with her

... and do something that will FORCE you to spend another month apart before making any kind of long-term decision.  

If you go with the intention of 3 months no-strings sex, go for it.  

But remember who you're fucking and avoid catching anything from any of her clients and avoid any tendency she has to discourage you or blackmail you into making sacrifices by stopping doing just exactly what you want to do when you want to do it.

personally i would never appreciate being put into a situation where i was forced to make a decision.  i don't believe in ultimatums, as i will always go against waht that person wants.  marriage is serious business, and it should be something that you want.  not what is imposed on you.  so only get married when your time is right, otherwise like with any other ultimatum, if you give in you will always wonder "what if".  

if you seriuosly are in love with this girl, then just stay there for a few months as your friend said and see waht she's really like.  also as another person has said, hire a PI to see what she's up to.  i know a friend who got married to a girl in china and then immigrated her over to canada only to find out 5 years later that she has a  bf the whole time. dumped his ass, and hten brought her bf over..  it was a shitty deal which he's never gotten over.  i mean they even had a baby together which she doesnt care for.. just left him and the baby.  that was seriously messed up as some women can be pretty evil.

On the most part, woman are evil.  Woman are trouble, if they are not kept under control, can be more destructive, and very unreasonable.  Your heart may feel love, but your life can be torn apart by a bad decision.  It's best not to follow your heart, in moments like these as social stability is much more important than an emotional moment.

everybody's comments are appreicated and noted. It was a lot of informative info on this question and now I have to sit down and carefully think this over before I make my next move. thanks yall