Alright bro Horny141...

What you are experiencing now...I gather all the bros have gone through at one time or another....

I was once in a situation like what you are experiencing now...I had a high maintenence girlfriend..( Fucking Gold digger..)

I got rid of her and began to punt like crazy...( Spending whatever money i had on wgs..And one night stands..)..Then one day a few of my mates and i sat down began to pull our resources together ...We began to incorpoate our skills together and now i look back and laugh....

I think what you are going through now is a "WAKE UP CALL"...It's time to stop feeling sorry for yourself and go make something of your life bro..

Do something adventurous...( Believe me bro when you get older..You will look back and regret that you didn't)..Make new friends..Start thinking about your future...The "RIGHT" girl for you will come naturally....Don't you believe that we all have a "SOUL-MATE" bro..

I was actually single for four years before i met my wife.....Eat, work and sleep was my daily routine...If i feeling a bit bored then i would go to a massage parlor..I spent all my free time at home by myself drinking to make the day past faster..

Then one day i went to a mate's house and started using his msn to talk to some of his friends...And lo and behold...That is how i met my "SOUL-MATE"..( I think it was fate that we met..)

Bro Horny141....Life has a funny way making things happen...No point sulking and feeling sorry for yourself...Do something about it...

"LIFE CAN ONLY GET BETTER.." ( Trust me..)

Ahhh......

Okay, thanks everyone for the encouragement.
After reading all your post, i think its time i get my lazy ass out of bed and start doing something meaningful.

Life is too short to feel sorry about yourself.

suck off man...I am happy...

all kidding aside, it is definately a good post  I will give back the +ve acceptance on your other post..please don't take my earlier rating seriously.

But

IMHO, punting is not what's making one happy or unhappy, its the "other" things which is making one punt. (Sorry I didn't go through all the post, someone may have already pointed this out) So, punting is not the root cause but merely its an effect...

I dont know if I am making myself clear.

Men punt because they are missing something in their life (no passion in life, not being loved, fugly or bitchy wife...etc etc etc). Punting gives them all that for one hour. Hell I know some bros who have damn hot gf or wife but they still punt

cheers, and happy punting...

[ Last edited by  ulebsari at 23-1-2010 08:53 ]

I never ever feel lonely in my life. I sometimes feel bored but never lonely. It is all about your attitudes towards life. If you think life can't get any better for you, then i can understand that you migth feel that way but you always have to say to yourself that it can and go do something about it. It doesnt matter if you're 10,20 or 50 years old, life is good and precious so go out and start punting. peace out

this thread captures the essence of this forum...guys who can be truthful w/ each other...i'm sure many of us do not or dare not to be this open w/ these thoughts in our normal lives...but a few thoughts:

1. punting is just a release from our normal lives.  when punting becomes the highlight of the day then you need to rethink your priorities.
2. humans are never satisfied...if you have all the material things in the world, you will think about wanting something else that you don't have but what someone else has...
3. wgs are so jaded that it is impossible to get a normal relationship from them...so don't joke w/ yourself to think that this one is different...

To be honest. mongering changed my life. i think for the better. . it's more satisfying rather than watching porn movies and jacking all by yourself.

LOL... dunno if it is for the better... but I can't imagine my life without punting or at least Bjs and HJs at the least.  My question is to those who never punt, or never cheat and or both.  How the fuck do they do it?  And don't say love because I love my wife and family more than anyone in the world but it doesn't stop me from punting.  Are those who are married and loyal to their wives and family happy?  I don't know man.  Happiness is so damn subjective, I wish I could stop punting, hunting and cheating for my family, but I think it's in my DNA.. Blame it on science baby!

The grass is always greener on the other side.  After long period of dating, I always seek freedom.  After long periods of freedom, I yearn to date.

Mongering, like all else, has it's advantages and disadvantages.  While you may be sleeping with beautiful women on a regular basis, your view of reality gets skewed and you feel that you couldn't settle for less.  It's like any drug: Feels great when you're high, but you'll always be left with an empty low.

The key is like many others have pointed out.  You need to find happiness/satisfaction outside of punting.  You need to cover more than one aspect of your life.  What else do you like?  Where are your buddies?  Personally, I think humans are always pessimistic.  We are genetically wired to respond to change, not idleness.  When people get bored of their routine, they begin to complain about the negatives of their life.  So bring positive change to your life.  Something like buying a new outfit will help your feel more confident.

As for me, I have no idea where my career path is taking me.  I feel insecure for my future.  But I have great groups of friends.  Friends I party with, work friends, punting friends, school friends, etc.  And some of them belong to more than one group.  I can't say I'm truly happy, but I'm satisfied with what I have.  When I'm not, I'll go and try something different and new.

If you love somebody - set him free!!

Frst marriage - 100% devoted to wife and family. Sleep, work, time with family and trying best to get happiness from family = failed marriage.  Prognosis - you cannot expect happiness from another person(s) - you gotta be happy yourself - and love yourself first and foremost.  

Second marriage - I do what I want to do and she does too - but somehow or another, we always instead look forward to spending time together.  No, don't get me wrong - I DO enjoy mongering around - but family still priority.

And luckily I am married to a Chinese gal who keeps one eye open, one eye closed - whilst she busily 24/7 devotes all her time/energy/love to the family.... and Lucky ME!!

You love yourself first and foremost - and you'll have LOTS of love and happiness left over to share.

Just my POV

SEAJ
edits for sp.

[ Last edited by  SEAJ at 25-1-2010 12:27 ]

this thread is honestly the cherry on the pie.

It shows that we brothers do not stand idle alone and that in some point of time - even the greatest fall.  

HOWEVER.

Have any of you guys thought of the opposite side of the picture?

When u monger and 'have fun' outside, what happens to the loyal wife / gf at home?

Are they loyal at all? or do they equally monger or do things behind our backs?

IDK and to be honest, IDC - as long as i dont find out - i m fine with anything.  Let me live in my little dream to think that in fact my wife / gf is loyal.

Maybe reality is only a fabrication anyway.  Though - u might be sure that you are the only one making the fabrication.

ON THE OTHER HAND THOUGH, im sure there are legit couples out there who walk their path straight... or WAIT, how can i be sure, it might be another fabrication.

Shady this world is...

Simple -
1. Don't let either know
2. don't let either lose face i.e. let friends etc know you've got something on the side
3. Don't get any STD's
4. don't get pregnant.
5. Deny deny deny

you follow this - does it matter if you're out playing golf, working, doing gorcery shopping - or getting clocks cleaned??!!

Don't matter none, family unit stays intact, everybody happy.

SEAJ

who the fuck cares? I am not truly happy at the moment cause my ass is still getting slammed for one old post

you are so fucking lucky.  Unfortunately I am married to a woman who considers me third class, behind her family, then our son, then me.  Family?  What family?  It's like a fucking broken house - the three of us are lucky to be at the dinner table more than once a month together.  Damn lucky if she cooks once a week - we either eat out or she'll get something to go and then we eat leftovers for the next 3 days.  We're always at each other's throat, and we're both constantly riding our kid's back, even though for all intents and purposes a great kid and the love of my life.  We literally haven't had sex since Dongzhi.  That's the life I lead when I get home.

sounds like a rough marriage. Why not just divorce? And what is Dongzhi?

divorce is not an option because the kid needs two parents and I'd get reamed on my assets.

so you would rather just be miserable for your entire life just for the sake of your kid? If so, that's a big sacrifice that I would be very hard to accept

Oh wow. That does sound bad.... very bad and I feel sorry for you.

Not much I or anybody here could/should advise you - except that it is always IMHO - a bad idea to get divorced NOT MATTER WHAT.  This may come across to you as being sanctimonious/hypocritical coming from me who's been divorced/re-married quite happily - but I never wanted the divorce PLUS when it happened, it really shattered my AND my kids' lives (and presumably also my ex-wife's too).  Nobody deserve such unhappiness/trauma - just not worth it AND completely avoidable.

And upon reflection, I should have just nipped it all in the bud - the begiining of the unhappiness in our marriage, that is.  I should have taken POSITIVE actions to 1. try to figure out what WAS actually wrong with the marriage 2. Identify parts that WAS my fault 3. Taken steps to correct myself first and just do it irrespective 4. Being the Male of the union, slowly, TENDERLY and with all the LOVE I know I am capable of having (for after all, I got married to her as I did love her), try to make her understand that we must now take steps together to preserve the union.  

Hindsight IS 20-20 - so howzabout you use what I learned as a foresight?

Saying that its too bad for the kid or your "assets" is an excuse.  You KNOW deep within your own heart that you don't want a divorce and that the whole thing is wrong - and I betcha your wife probably thinks the same thing.  So why continue to live together in misery??  Since you ARE gonna stay married, PLEASE do what is necessary.

Or as my Dad would have said it - you're the man - you have the responsibility, right and duty to preserve the marriage.

Just IMHO

SEAJ
eidts for grammar/sp.

[ Last edited by  SEAJ at 26-1-2010 12:02 ]

I agree completely.

I'm happy, and so is my wife and family, because what I do in China stays in China and doesn't affect my home life or relationships in Australia at all.

The only case where that wouldn't be true would be if I spent too much money, because that affects my family.  As long as I stick to what I can truly afford (and won't be noticed), all is ok and everyone is happy.

How many married people are happy? I am married btw and monger regularly and I am not happy
I can see your point but on the other hand imagine not being in HK and try to monger as much. You would go hungry.
If you want love or conquest just go for it but are you ready to take the negative shit as well like being rejected or broke-up after 2 weeks etc. You would feel even worse. WHy you dont buy a chinese 20 yo wife or something if that makes you feel better? Just dont let her take all your money!!!

Sounds like you need a GF in the same situation, Chinese preferred I'm guessing.

Fredericjeitz:  I am married and happy and I monger.  If you lost your wife, kids and family then I'd bet that you would be miserable let alone not happy.  Most of us don't realize how good we have it, until we lose it.  I am just glad I have my wife, kids and family because if you don't, you have nothing, at least in IMHO.

[ Last edited by  sexpert at 27-1-2010 01:17 ]