Hey there...

I'm looking for the wisdom of the experienced folks here who have a wife or a live in girlfriend, I just can't find a moment to myself to monger, and I'm wondering how you guys all do it.

My girlfriend keeps me under a tight leash pretty much all of the time, there not one or two hours of the day that I can be alone and mongering.

Whats the secret?

Sounds like you're wearing a collar along with that leash ... at the risk of sounding unsympathetic ... you're letting her control your time without requiring her to satisfy you fully?  

You will have to educate her - if she wants to earn your time, she will have to pay MUCH more attention to your wants

How can you not be able to find an hour or two to monger unless you're joined at the hips?    i think a lot of girls would like to know your GF's secret.  

Dude if that's the case, then you ought look first at your relationship with your control freak GF/Wife.

...she does pay me "SPECIAL" attention....quite often...

The question goes back to getting time on my own without raising her suspicions.

I've only managed to monger by taking S/L from work in the afternoon without her knowing.....its a bit risky...I'm afraid to bump into one of her friends/family while doing so.

Me --->   <--- My Brain

does she never go out on her own?  be with friends, shop, etc?
do you not have friends to go with...just you and your buddies?  make up imaginary ones and tell her you're going out with the guys for a drink.

Yeah definately a control freak.

One of my friends is a control freak to his wife....dunno how they r still married

Get her to start playing Mahjong... You'll have enough time to get to Macau and back without her noticing.

Unless both of you work in the same office, go and come back to/from work together, lives together, neither of you ever go out of HK for biz trip, spend the weekends together with family members, bringing her or you along for gathering with her or your friends/ colleagues...................Then, I suggest you stay the way you are.....Stop thinking bout coming out to monger.   bcos we really cannot help you.

Sounds like she's very suspicious of you, and cannot trust you for an hour or two alone...
Has she caught you before...?

I think someone hit it right on the nail when he said that she probably doesn't have her own friends.  I find that I separate my times with the family and then with friends.  We spend family time at least 3 times weekly, me the wife and the three boys.  My wife has her own time with her friends and their kids sometimes on the weekends and I go out to play basketball, baseball, football or whatever us guys like to do (including mongering A LOT, and we could always shower since we usually end up at the gym working out afterwards anyways).   Sounds like your gF doesn't have any friends and has isolated herself and yourself from all your friends which is VERY unhealthy and weird.  I had a friend that had a girl who tried that BS on him once, dropped that bitch like a stone... hell, the bitch even played the suicide game with him, threatening to cut her wrists, he  just called 911 and the police came.. even put a restraining order on her.  You can't let bitches like that get a hold of you like that, totally not worth the loss of freedom and independence.  Sounds to me that you are really young and don't know how to get rid of her and find a better mate.  Best to just lose her.

a nooner during an early lunch "with your collegues" works--if she calls, you could not hear your phone in the resteraunt......

Agreed sexpert. You only live once so you don't wanna spend the next 30-50 years being married to a control freak when there are plenty more fish in the sea!

I think he is not asking for opinion how to get rid of her GF or what kind of person she really is. Our bro just want to know how to monger without letting her GF knows.

We are in no position to judge his GF or presume what kind of person she is.

He's asking for the secret... the secret is to find another mate who is not so CONTROLLING! LOL...  and I don't think we need to presume what kind of person she is because we know what type of person she is.  Controlling with a tight leash as described by himself.

sexpert:

...how convenient!...so is this where much of the ball grabbing takes place?...

...thats right everyone, our bro is asking for "the secret" and guess who has it?....

Hunter's post is what I'm getting at...

I've never said I was unhappy with my girlfriend, I just want to be able to monger more.

Thanks to everyone who chipped in with advice!

Sexpert, I can flick your balls now......ouch!!!

Suggest you figure out a couple of hobbies she is likely to hate, and take up one of them.  

Gym
Orienteering
Chess
Playing dominos with the boys

... when you found one, bingo, insist on a regular leave of absence.  

Seriously, if you don't have any time to yourself aside from the time you sold to your employer, you do have a relationship problem!

Have a baby.  She will be so caught up in the baby that she wont even notice you.
Give her a surprise trip to visit her family.  This can only be used a couple of times.
Help her to find a friend, (girl) to hang out with.  However, this can back fire depending on the wildness of the friend.