Reply #1 wander's post
Wander, thanks for sharing. I didn't realize I would get free therapy when I joined this forum. I've only had one case of a significant outside rekatiinship with a WG, but I can relate to and confirm everything you have said on this thread.
My experience was a little different because the WG was married during her working days and I became the threat to the husband.
Short set-up: girl is Filipina civie, falls in love with a US serviceman who marries her and takes her to the US. Normal civie life ensues until hubby loses his job. Girl's secretarial gig isn't paying the bills and hubby suggests she dance at a strip club. She does and quickly becomes a top tier talent at the biggest club in a major metro area. This feels very wrong to both of them at first but they both quickly get very comfortable with the cash.
The trouble is she is so good she attracts very wealthy repeat clients who start throwing cash at her for outside work. She is addicted to the cash, plus thoroughly enjoys being with accomplished athletes, dentists and lawyers as opposed to the guy at home who just plays X-Box all day while she pays all the bills.
She hides the escorting from him at first, but it quickly catches up with her. He is crushed at first but quickly comes around, enjoying his new gamer lifestyle. He even starts helping her run her business - booking appointments, driving her, playing the security role. And with all the cash lying around the house he starts helping himself to WGs on the side, too.
Eventually, this nearly destroys the marriage so they decide to take action (sort-of). They move to another part of the US and while she still strips, they both vow she will never escort again. Right...
Enter your humble author.... I become her best client in the new locale and we become very close. I know all about her husband who she wants to leave. We start spending significant time together outside work and I stop paying her. Never did pay her for sex (because she no longer escorts) and we travel and do all sorts of things a normal couple would do. I'm completely in love with her and I truly believe (to this day) she feels the same way.
We prepare to each leave our spouses for each other (we both separated) and she thinks the affair is secret. She covers for the trips and overnights away from her home by saying she is with girlfriends (so she tells me).
Trouble is she exposed me without my knowledge: she is telling him that she is with me and lying that I am paying her and it's nothing. Little does she know he is reading her email the whole time and knows the real truth between us.
Once he figures out I haven't actually been paying her and that we really are in love and she's about to leave, he takes action. He confronts me (by email) and ultimately tells my wife.
We still prepare to be together while both our spouses fight to save the marriages, but I'm still have a warning bell in the back of my head. Even though she and I have agreed that I will not be with her unless she quits the sex trade altogether, I'm still nervous about her past.
I do some deep seaeching and find out she has lied to me and is seeing a couple other clients, too. Not nearly as often as me and I don't think she loves them, bit as Wander says, once a WG..... I approach her and she partially confesses, then confesses some more but I still know she hasn't come completely clean.
In the end, she does me a great favor...she told me her biggest fear...that she would continue to hurt me...that she couldn't be trusted. That was refreshing honesty and that day I did the hardest thing I've ever done when I broke up with her.
We've had no contact since but for a while my wife and I would still get calls from her husband, sure that we were together again. Nope, it's someone else, bro, she can't be trusted.
For her I think she could truly be in love with just one person, but she was too close to the WG life to get away from the variety. She would leave her husband as a trade-up (better financial security, better companionship), but couldn't be faithful. Like a couple guys said above, she is one of us. | |
