Originally posted by hkplayboy at 16-6-2011 16:09
I am still battling my urges. ...
Don't battle them bro. If you 'battle' them they will get bigger.
You have a choice to make, about what you can and cannot talk to your GF about. Getting her input might help ...
"Honey, I want to talk, because I love our relationship and love the way we share and accept each others' fantasies. It makes me want to give you as much as I can of what you need and want!
You said you were jealous about my curtain bar experience. If I ever happen to have an experience like that, do you prefer to hear about it, so you can share it too, or do you prefer our relationship to be only about 'us'? "
Ultimately the best advice I've been given - by a wise old woman - was "I wish my first husband had just gone off and done what he needed to do, during the time I was too possessive and insecure, because then we could have stayed together and it would have been so much better for the children and for us too".
If you can do what you need to do while also respecting her feelings and territory, you're in a much healthier position than if you choose unilaterally to do stuff without including her or consulting her.
Question is: do you even WANT to know how she feels about your hooker fantasy??
Is going off behind her back PART OF the fantasy, or can you risk her saying "it makes me uncomfortable" when you tell her your feelings? |
